FicWad

Title: While You Were Sleeping
Author: Cerasi J.
Rating: PG
Summary: What does Jesse do while Suze is asleep for two days? FLUFF WARNING!!!
Disclaimer: ::sigh:: If only Jesse would watch me while I slept... oh, sorry! Anyway, I don't own Suze or Jesse... (::sniffle::), and I never will... (::sniffle::) ... all money goes to Jenny Carroll.
Author's Note: This one is told from Jesse's POV. ^.^''

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When I walked into Susannah's room, the first thing I noticed was Spike sitting on the window seat. I smiled at the cat and scratched the top of his head. I tried to ignore the quiet sounds Susannah made as she got ready for bed.

I also tried to ignore the sudden rush of adoration I felt for her.

Very carefully keeping my back to her, I looked out the window at the ocean. Moonlight cast shadows over the valley and made the sea glitter like diamonds. It was a very beautiful view from up here.

But it wasn't the ocean I was thinking about, no, I was thinking about something else.

And for just a brief moment, I felt that something's eyes on my back. I didn't want to turn around, didn't want to see her face. If I did, I might do something I'd regret later.

But I've already done something I'll regret. I've gone and fallen in love with Susannah.

I continued staring out the window, trying to fight my feelings back. From the moment I met her, I liked Susannah, liked the way she acted. She didn't-/doesn't/-let anyone push her around.

Not even Diego.

How I hated that man. And I wasn't one to hate; it just wasn't in my blood. But I hated Diego, and I hated Maria too, not because she had me killed. No, that was a very long time ago and it was forgotten.

I hated her because she'd tried to take away the one thing that meant the most to me.

Susannah.

I finally dared to glance over my shoulder at her; she was already fast asleep. I couldn't help but smiling at her. I walked slowly towards her bed, making sure she was asleep. I stood at the end of the bed and gazed down at her.

I wished I wasn't dead. Wished she had been alive in my time, or that I could be alive in her's. It just wasn't fair. Nothing was. Not for Mediators and ghosts.

Susannah was beautiful, I thought, the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

When I first met Maria, I was told to think she was beautiful, but privately, I didn't think she was all that great.

She was nice-looking, yes, maybe even pretty. But she came no where near being as beautiful as Susannah was.

I crossed my arms in front of me, trying to restrain myself from picking her up and hugging her. Susannah sighed and rolled over in her sleep. That's when I caught a glimpse of something on her forehead.

I sat down on the side of her bed and brushed her bangs away from her eyes.

There was a very large, very painful looking bruise on her forehead, which, I had no doubt, Maria somehow inflicked on her.

Before I actually had a chance to stop myself, I leaned down and planted a gentle kiss on her forehead.

That was when I realized how much I loved her, and how grateful I was to her. She risked her life to save me, then shrugged like nothing had happened at all.

When I saw her standing there, standing in... that place, I was worried, angry, and hurt all at the same time.

Worried, because I was afraid she had died, too, angry because she risked her life to come find me, and hurt because I thought she was the one that had me exorised.

But when Susannah explained that it was Maria, not her, the hurt went away and was replaced with a funny urge to slap her and say, "What the hell do you think you're doing?! Don't you know you can get yourself killed up here?!"

I sighed. I knew I should go soon, but I didn't want to, didn't want to leave her side. So I didn't. Instead, I layed down beside her, put my arms around her and held her close as she slept.

I just wanted to be near to her for a little while, just wanted her to know how much I cared for her.

I rested my cheek on the top of Susannah's head and sighed again. I knew I would never be able to let her go, not now.

I tried not to think about that, instead, I thought of all the things I noticed about her this very minute. Like how soft her skin was, and how her hair smelled of vanilla.

The only thing I was capable of thinking was, I don't want this to end, I don't want this to end...

And I didn't, I loved Susannah, and honestly, I really don't know what I'd ever do without her.

I hugged her tightly, I knew it was time to go now. I let go of Susannah and stood up, taking one last minute to study her face in the moonlight.

I brushed her hair from her eyes once more and said very quietly, "I love you, /querida/, thank you."

As I was walking back towards the window to get Spike, I could have sworn I heard her say, "You're welcome, Jesse."

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