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Categories > Movies > Godfather

Confessions of a Protective Older Brother

There is more than one side to every story. This is how Michael saw Connie's breakdown at the end of the first Godfather movie.

Category: Godfather - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama - Characters:  - Warnings: [!!] - Published: 2006/09/12 - Updated: 2006/09/12 - 579 words - Complete

Reviews

• Confessions of a Protective Older Brother

  (#) Anon 2006-10-08 07:21:58 AM

  Your writing sux! Obvious from your lack of reviews, you should stop. Hell, except from some crappy one-shots, you can't even finish a story. Add to that, you're posting here on this shitty-ass website (not a real one like FictionAllet or FFN), and it just goes to show you blow. Do us all a favor and take up another hobby. Writing isn't for you.

• Confessions of a Protective Older Brother

  (#) Rous 2006-10-10 06:26:03 PM

  Well, as promised, I came and read. Very interesting take on Michael's thoughts. Now, while I disagree with the other reviewer, I do have a few issues with this. Grammar being one and for the other. There are some punctuation issues that could be cleared up with a bit of attention.
  
  The biggest thing, though, is the lack of substance. You tell a good story, but it lacks depth. More description would help. Some of the sentences could be combined to form paragraphs. I think work in the form is definately needed.
  
  Otherwise, I found this very much in line with the book and the movie. Thank you for sharing.

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