Categories > Books > Harry Potter > The Very Silly School Crossover Fic
Scenes from Harry’s Third Year
10 reviewsMiss Fritton deals with Harry's scar and Dumbledore, and an inter-school Quidditch match
5Funny
The Very Silly School Crossover Fic
By Dr. T
She-Who-Must-Be-Mentioned and her subsidiaries and partners own the Canon Potter-verse. Ronald Searle’s estate and various UK companies and associations own the St. Trinian rights. I indulged in crossing over by taking a hockey stick to the pair of them. The HP folks whinged a great deal, while the St. Trinian girls merely stuck out their collective tongues and offered me a shot of home brew – which might account for this fic, come to think about it.
*
Chapter 02 — Scenes from Harry’s Third Year.
“Harry WILL be coming back,” Dumbledore insisted. “Do you think your girls will have any protection against the Dementors? The Ministry will insist, to try and capture Sirius Black.”
“Ah, and now we come to the other reason why I allowed you entrance.”
The two looked puzzled, until they heard a voice behind them.
“Ah, Albus, Minnie. Surprised to see me?”
The pair swung around, and found themselves covered not only by a wand-wielding Sirius Black but three witches, armed the same way. “Prepare to hear a strange but true tale, Minnie.” His face hardened. “Then we’ll see how much Albus here already knew.”
As it transpired, while Dumbledore suspected a bit, he actually knew little of the truth. The Hogwarts pair was sent back to Hogwarts just over an hour later, without Harry but with a mandate to capture a rat. To the surprise of Camilla Fritton, who sometimes believed that few outside of the St. Trinian’s family (and not all that many within it) were capable, Peter Pettigrew would be unmasked that very evening at dinner, making Harry Potter’s transfer out of Hogwarts page three news, as the saga of Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black took up all of page one.
From there the scandal would spread. Remus Lupin was outed as a werewolf by Snape, causing him to leave Hogwarts by the end of that first weekend. Barty Crouch would be revealed to have smuggled his son out of Azkaban, thus ending his career, although the younger Crouch managed to escape custody. Fudge just managed to hang on to his job, but would be put under closer scrutiny. Lucius Malfoy and the others who had pled being under the ‘imperius’ took deeper cover. A faction centered on Madam Bones and Madam Longbottom took basic control of the government.
All that would transpire over the next two weeks. Once Dumbledore and McGonagall had left the grounds the morning after the transfer, and Sirius and the three witches who had been with him had also left, Miss Fritton sent for the Head Girl.
“You wanted to see me, Miss?”
“Ah, Miss Dawn, do come in and sit down. How are our new arrivals?”
“The Granger girl and Harry seem to have briefed them well, and all the girls but the Lovegood girl had some accurate knowledge of us before last spring. They made no complaints about the magic rules.” There were few rules at St. Trinian’s, but those few were strictly enforced. All wand usage was limited to the magic wing and the attached greenhouse, which held magical plants. Wands were not to be taken out of those areas barring emergencies.
“Good, good. Go on. They have all been provided copies of the drills?”
The school was a very unconventional, and to most outsiders, at best it was semi-organized chaos. It was quite amazing how much learning was somehow accomplished (granted, there was at least as much unconventional learning going on outside of classes as standard learning inside them). Except when the O.W.L./N.E.W.T. examiners were present, however, the magical side of officialdom rarely intruded. Intrusion from the Muggle side, especially the various education authorities, was more common. A series of drills insured that the school could be made presentable to official Muggle eyes on very short notice.
“Yes, they have. They seem to be adapting better than most of the older first arrivals do. Well, Harry got quite a bit of teasing. . . .”
Miss Fritton smiled. “As the only male under thirty who will be consistently here, he had best get used to it.”
“Yes, well, Granger and Bell took exception to that, and they would have been in for it, except, well. . . .”
“Yes?”
“Harry is going to become a right powerful wizard,” Barbara Dawn replied. “His magic flared, even though he didn’t have his wand out. To be frank, he scared the crap out of quite a few of us.”
“Miss Dawn! Language!” Fritton frowned. “Unless you were speaking literally?”
“Very literal!”
“Oh, dear. Miss Jacobs again?”
“And more than a dozen others, including the chief spiv!”
“They are calling themselves the Piranhas again now, I believe. Well, if Miss Hopkins had an accident, then we will excuse Miss Jacobs, although I had hoped that new potion would help her problem.”
“I think it did, a bit, Miss. At least compared to some of the others!”
“Well, that is some success, I suppose. I am sure the house elves cleaned up well last night, and will be willing to do some early laundering. Have any of the girls been adopted into the tribes yet?” St. Trinian’s did not have houses, but the girls, by the end of their first year, were adopted into unofficial tribes. Some of the tribes were constant over the years, others came and went. Girls sometimes transferred to new groups at the beginning of each term.
“Actually, they all have been.”
“Already?” Miss Fritton was surprised.
“Yeah, I mean, yes. Granger is a natural swot, even though she doesn’t have the technical background to be a Geek, at least not yet. Still, they’re happy to have her and Brocklehurst. They’ll both catch up in no time.”
“Go on.”
“The little Lovegood girl was taken into the Ecos. Talbot is a Totty, while French made Totty-in-training.” Unless they developed very fast, most girls had to be fifteen to be an official Totty. The hottest two or three in their last year would run the group as the Hot Totties, although there was talk in the group to call themselves the Hot Totties and the leaders Posh Totties. “Davis will likely be running the spivs, I mean, the Piranhas, by the end of next year. Perks, Moon, and Jones rather defaulted.”
“Well, dear, if our girls can’t be Wiccans, who can?”
“Very true, Miss.”
“Miss Bell, I take it, joined the jocks?”
“Yes, Miss. I think she’ll be an excellent addition to the field hockey team.”
“Ask her, Miss Statham, and Miss Coral to see me when we’re through. I believe we will be having a Quidditch game next spring at Hogwarts.”
“Very good, Miss Fritton.” Dawn seemed to hesitate.
“Yes?”
“Is it true that Harry killed a giant basilisk at Hogwarts last spring?”
Miss Fritton smiled. “It is. The Headmaster of Hogwarts will be getting notice from the goblins next week, staking Harry’s claim. It will no doubt add to his aggravation.”
*
It was Friday, September 10, before Harry was allowed to invite Hermione to his quarters, so the pair could catch up in private. Most weeknights, Harry had to be out of the school proper between 8:00 in the evening and 7:00 the next morning; 10:00 and 7:00 on other nights. As stated, there were few rules at St. Trinian’s, but that was a firm one (at least until Harry was older). Likewise, Hermione was not allowed into the private quarters without both Harry’s and Miss Fritton’s permission.
Miss Fritton was out, but had allowed Hermione to visit Harry starting at four for a light tea. Hermione would then join Harry and his cousin for dinner. Miss Fritton usually ate breakfast and lunch with the students and any staff who wished to in the dining hall. However, two or three nights a week, and most Sunday afternoons, she dined in her quarters with various students and staff. Over the 6-8 years most students spent at St. Trinian’s, any given student would dine with the headmistress at least five times. Friday nights, however, Miss Fritton was usually dining out, keeping up the networking needed to protect St. Trinian’s within the wider world. Harry wondered about this deviation, but had learned enough over the summer to realize that if it affected him, he would be told.
“We haven’t had much time to talk,” Harry said, pouring tea for Hermione, to her surprise. “How are you settling in, now that you’re here?”
Hermione added a touch of lemon to her tea while thinking that over. She realized that Harry had had much of the summer to think things over and come to terms with the culture of their new school. Due to their various ‘at home’ situations, there were usually between 15-30 girls who stayed over most or all of the summer. This past summer, there had been 18, and they had given Harry a taste of what the regular terms would be like.
Finally, Hermione confessed, “I’m not sure which is the more odd: how chaotic the instruction is, or the fact that we are learning so much despite of it.”
“That’s part of the magic of St. Trinian’s,” Harry said. Seeing the look on Hermione’s face, Harry went on, “Well, from what Miss Black and the Headmistress told me, Hogwarts is located at one of the most magical places in Britain. Did Hogwarts: A History mention it was built over one of the major stone circles left by The Old Ones?”
“No,” Hermione almost growled, “it didn’t.”
“A great deal of the ambient magic, and the magic expended by the students over the years, go into powering things like the portraits and the gargoyle guarding the headmaster’s suite, the Sorting Hat, and even the very castle itself, which is nearly as aware as the Sorting Hat. That’s in addition to hidden magical defenses which should come into play if the castle is attacked, and all that on top of the wards. Where Hogwarts was built over a sacrificial circle, St. Trinian’s was built over a sacred spring, very different magic. Here, other than the wards, the magic is channeled to the school and then back into the students. On top of that, the magic expended here is slightly different than the total magic expended at Hogwarts.”
“In what way, Harry?”
“Well, Miss Black claims that while the magic men have and the magic women have are over ninety-five percent the same, they are slightly different in some ways. Most of the difference is supposed to complement each other, but there is also some conflict. The conflicts between the magics cause disturbances which Hogwarts draws upon to generate the sentience of the castle and some of the defensive wards. Here, the overwhelming magic is female, and that while women are in many ways as competitive as men, their, well, your unique magics work better for sharing.”
“So, despite the seeming chaos, we learn better here because the feminine magic is helping us?” Hermione asked doubtfully.
Harry shrugged. “So they claim, anyway. I have no idea if that’s why it works that way, or how it works even if they’re correct. Still, they believe it, and so the Headmistress said there could be no more than five active male magic users here on a day-to-day basis, and ten of the magically-touched.”
Hermione thought. “Well, right now you’re the only wizard, and only three of the six men on the regular staff are Squ, I mean, magically touched. We do need at least more magical instructor, though.”
“That’s where Miss Fritton is right now, or at least that’s what she said.” Harry thought a moment, and then asked, “Is it difficult in the dorms?”
Hermione shook her head. “Not really. Actually, there are only two dorm areas, one for the magic users in the magic wing, and the rest are in the attics upstairs. There are ninety-three of us, and even though there is less privacy, there is actually a bit more personal space than at Hogwarts.”
The two drank tea quietly for a moment, Harry enjoying the company and Hermione enjoying the company and the quiet, the latter being something St. Trinian’s was certainly not known for. Finally, Hermione looked at Harry, trying to frame a question.
“The basilisk, or Sirius Black?” he asked.
“Both,” Hermione admitted. “I was trying to decide which to ask about first.”
“I was snuck into Hogwarts yesterday morning, along with a team from Gringotts – Dumbledore didn’t want the students to know about it. They should have finished with the snake today, and be finished cleaning out the whole subterranean area sometime tomorrow. Myrtle’s bathroom is permanently closed, as the entrances to the underground area and to the Chamber are being left open for a while, so that the Hogwarts people can decide what to do about it.”
“What are they doing with the snake?”
“Basilisk parts are worth a lot of money. I found out this summer that I come into a nice estate, phased in by stages starting when I’m seventeen and ending when I’m twenty-five, so I don’t need all of it. Gringotts gets a fifth for processing everything, shoring up the subterranean areas, handling the sales, and so on. After that, I’ll take two shares of the rest – I was going to get four, but I’m donating one to St. Trinian’s – Hogwarts gets two shares, and that other share is being divided between those of you who were petrified, plus Ron and Ginny.”
“You didn’t have to do that!”
Harry shrugged. “It felt right.”
“So I’ll get a little more than two percent of the proceeds from the basilisk. . . .”
“Plus anything else found down there,” Harry pointed out.
“. . . . just for being petrified? That doesn’t seem right.”
Harry shrugged. “Like I said, sharing felt right. If anything, you should have gotten more, since you helped solve the problem. If the basilisk sales are about what they think they will be, and there isn’t anything else, you should get between eight and eleven thousand Galleons over the next few years.”
“That’s a lot,” Hermione stated, a bit surprised.
Harry shrugged it off. “As for Black, his trial was this morning, and he got off. Cousin Camilla has my custody, though, and I’m happy here, so that won’t be affected. Since Snape got Professor Lupin fired, and he’s supposed to be an old friend of Black as well as my parents, the Headmistress thought the pair would likely go off together so Black can recover from Azkaban and being on the run.”
Hermione noted the different terms for Miss Fritton Harry used, depending on the situation, and decided that was probably wise.
“Nonsense, Harry.”
The two students stood up, slightly surprised that they had not heard anyone enter. Miss Fritton came in and sat, and allowed Harry to pour her tea. “You are settling in well, I hear, Miss Granger.”
“Thank you, Miss.”
Fritton sipped her tea and, looking over the cup at Hermione, asked, “Something still bothers you about us, though.”
Hermione frowned, but while not wanting to question the Headmistress, she was both curious and concerned. “The approach to things is just so different from what I am used to, both from Primary school and Hogwarts, which were different enough from each other.”
“Were they really all that different in their actual methods, dear? I grant you the differences in subjects, but in fundamental approach?” Seeing the confusion of Hermione’s face, she continued, “At Hogwarts, the Headmaster has tried to have you taught that the world is divided into Light and Dark, or good and evil. There is of course some truth to that, but only some. We at St. Trinian’s look at the tendencies of the world as being more divided into Order and Chaos, and in their extremes both are bad, although not necessarily evil. At its extreme, as personified by either Dumbledore or Voldemort, Order means stagnation; an unchanging world. It would be the Order of Grindelwald in the magical world, the Nazis or Communists of the mundane. Granted, the Order of Voldemort or Grindelwald would mean chains and extreme oppression of, well, everything. The Order of Dumbledore's world would be a velvet and silk straightjacket, but in reality, under the surface, it is still oppression.”
“Really?” Hermione asked.
“Yes. Look at all your courses at Hogwarts. Like your primary school, all the instructors claim to teach the ‘best way’ to approach their subjects, but they will only consider one way, the way they were taught, or the way the system they were and are teaching in way to look at things. Granted, in your primary school, there was likely a variety of ‘best ways,’ as the fashions and fads of mundane education change nearly as fast and as facilely as their fashions.” Miss Fritton smiled. “To stick with the magical, however, I am sure you can easily see how Potions and History at Hogwarts fell into that line, but Transfiguration and Charms merely have better instructors. Astronomy, Herbology and so on are taught the same way they were taught a century or more ago. Muggle Studies still look at how the Purebloods viewed the mundane world around 1900, and that agelessness is reflected in all the courses.”
Hermione was speechless.
“Chaos is meaninglessness even more extreme than the oppression of a Voldemort-led world. We strive for extreme innovation here at St. Trinian's. At first, it may seem chaotic, but it is not. It is perhaps anarchic; that is, it is extreme innovation within the confines of the attempts at extreme Order the outside world tries to straightjacket us into. You will learn the 'correct' way of viewing and doing things, but only as you learn other ways to do those things, and even more. Unlike Hogwarts, we do not train our students to be rule-loving administrators and pompous aristocrats. Children in Order-oriented schools are given an idealized image of the world and then thrust them, unsuspecting, out into the very disorderly, selfish, and even cruel world unprepared. St. Trinian's sends her children out into that world well-prepared, which is usually unprepared for such children. The world is our oyster, and you, unlike the students of Hogwarts, will know how to get to the most of the pearls.”
There was a knock on the door, and Miss Fritton called them in. “Are we pearls, too, or just swine?” a man said. Hermione and Harry turned towards the voice and saw Black and Lupin were standing in the doorway.
“That remains to be seen,” Miss Fritton stated. She turned to Harry. “I believe I said they would be together, but I do not believe I said they would go off anywhere. In any event, please meet our two new magical tutors, Mister Black and Mister Lupin. I believe they, unlike most wizards, will fit into St. Trinian’s very nicely.”
After the three guests had left, Miss Fritton looked at her cousin. “Your friend is having the most difficult time settling in so far of all our Hogwarts transfers, although she is doing fairly well academically.”
Harry shrugged. “She finds comfort in order and routine. When she gets used to St. Trinian’s, that will be her routine, no matter how chaotic, excuse me, anarchic, it would seem to anyone else.”
“That’s what I thought,” Fritton agreed with a smile. “It will come together for her and all the girls on All Hallows Eve.”
“That ritual. . . .”
“We are a coven of witches, Harry,” Fritton reminded him, “even those here without any touch of magic. On two nights a year, we act as such. We are not ‘dark’, let alone satanic.”
“I know,” Harry agreed, as this had all been explained to him that summer. He gestured at his scar.
“Yes, once the coven is together, we will be able to deal with that the next evening, no matter how evil it may be.”
*
Friday, November, 18, 1993
“Good afternoon, Camilla,” Dumbledore said as the witch exited the floo into his office. “What may I do for you?”
“In truth,” she replied, dusting herself off, “on the whole I am here to supply you with some information. However, I would hope you will be truthful in answering some questions for me afterwards.”
Worried, Dumbledore showed her to a chair and offered tea from a service the elves had delivered just before his visitor had arrived.
“Thank you,” Fritton said, taking a cup. Her eyes hardened. “I am certain that, at least after the events of late last spring if not long before, you were aware Harry housed a Horcrux, or more accurately, a partial Horcrux.”
Dumbledore sighed. He very much wished he could Obliviate that knowledge, but doubted she was the only one who now possessed it. “That was one of several possibilities I thought of, back in 1981. As you say, the diary makes it rather more certain.”
“Made it,” Fritton stated. “We removed and destroyed the soul fragment in a ritual on the eve of All Souls.”
Dumbledore sat back on his throne-like chair, slack-jawed and stunned.
“Ah, we rather thought you had, as your reputation would suggest, consulted no one other than yourself. Exorcising the soul fragment was rather easy, in fact. Now, before we did so, we managed to extract a fair amount of information from it. That,” Miss Fritton had to state, “was by far much more difficult.”
“Information? Anything on the remaining four Horcruxes?”
“Five,” Miss Fritton stated.
“Five? I thought he’d have seven fragments in total, six Horcruxes and the main spirit fragment.”
“Tom Riddle was brilliant in many ways, but he still was likely mad long before he made his first Horcrux. He was certainly insane afterwards. We had certain information on four, and those have been tracked down and destroyed.” Dumbledore was even more shocked. “I am afraid destroying the Horcrux also destroyed the magic in these objects.” Out of her large purse, Miss Fritton pulled Hufflepuff’s chalice (recovered with the aid of the goblin girls who had attended St. Trinian’s) and Ravenclaw’s diadem. (Recovered with help from Dobby, who had been working at Hogwarts until he had delivered the diadem. He now worked at St. Trinian’s.) She did not mention that Sirius had given the locket to his half-mad elf, and Harry now had the ring.
“We were unable to scry much about the last Horcrux. It seems to be, or more likely be contained inside, a rather large serpent of some sort, somewhere to the southeast. Italy or the Balkans perhaps?” She shrugged. “In any case, he cannot make any more without limiting his ability to animate any sort of body he is able to reconstruct for himself. It is also uncertain if one anchor would be enough to keep his soul in this world if he were to be banished again, considering how small a fragment his consciousness is housed with.” She gave Dumbledore a hard look. “Any questions, Albus?”
“I confess my amazement, Camilla.”
“No doubt. Why was the cottage the Potters were hiding in not examined?”
Dumbledore frowned. “I thought it had been.”
“If so, it was very poorly done. Voldemort had a dirk, one matching that sword you so proudly display, prepared to house his Horcrux. When he was blasted by the reflected Killing Curse, for some reason the fragment he had prepared to become the Horcrux was damaged enough that some lodged in that scar of Harry’s, and some was in the knife. Neither was likely strong enough to anchor Voldemort. Still, the dirk was certainly next to Harry’s head when the curse was cast, but it bounced down to the floor, between the crib and the wall. It was still there last Saturday, when we recovered it.”
Fritton pulled the dirk out of her handbag with a polyester handkerchief and set it on Dumbledore’s desk. “That handkerchief is made out of artificial material, and is magically inert. Touching the dirk without it or something similar would be at least somewhat dangerous.” She pulled out a sheet of paper with typewritten instructions. “This will show you how to use the dirk as a Voldemort detector, although for any accuracy it would have to be within a hundred miles or so. It should also detect the final Horcrux at thirty miles, and any Dark mark nearby. We have also listened to the so-called prophecy, and the expert opinion is that it is a useless pile of dragon droppings.”
Dumbledore was unable to respond.
“No doubt Voldemort will make attempts on Harry. I hold you responsible for destroying the Dark Lord.”
“But. . . .” Dumbledore protested.
“Tell me, did Tom Riddle regard you as a mentor?”
“Certainly not! He didn’t regard anyone. . . .” He stopped.
“There you are, then. A power ‘he knew not’. I am certain you can easily come up with several more, after you consider these.” She handed him another sheet of paper. “There you are, Albus, thirty-seven different possible ‘powers he knows not’ which would NOT involve Harry confronting him a fourth time in person!”
“I will of course consider them all, and try to add to them,” Dumbledore had to admit.
Fritton gave him a nod of satisfaction. “Now, on to a totally different matter. Do you have any decision on a Quidditch match in the spring? It would so help the girls sort out a set team.”
“Severus was very interested, if for the wrong reasons,” Dumbledore had to admit.
“Ah, he learned I was headmistress, and is hoping to humiliate myself, Harry, and, being the sexist swine he is, my girls as well.”
Dumbledore winced. “I would not have put it so bluntly, but alas, you are essentially correct, especially on the first two points.” He looked up. “I warn you, Slytherin plays rough.”
Fritton merely smiled. “Oh, I do hope so.”
*
June, 1994
“Ladies, Gentlemen, and Slytherins. . . .”
“Mister Jordan!”
“Sorry. Welcome to the first inter-school Quidditch match at Hogwarts since 1974!”
The students and guests applauded.
“Headmaster Dumbledore is setting down the portkey target, and we await the staff and girls of St. Trinian’s, plus one!”
Many of the Muggle-raised chuckled slightly as an enormous bubble appeared above the pitch, and slowly floated down to settle on the ground, revealing the St. Trinian group. Miss Fritton was not dressed as Glenda, however. She and her staff were in their regular Muggle dress, the students in their gymslips, boaters, and, because of the cool Scottish weather, matching jumpers. The team however, was in a hodge-podge of makeshift uniforms and mismatched Quidditch pads, but with armbands in St. Trinian colors. Oddly, the non-playing students (except for the three carrying the three different St. Trinian banners) were all carrying hockey or lacrosse sticks in their left hands and wands in their right.
Dumbledore was startled at the sheer number of St. Trinian girls present, until he realized that over half had to be Squibs. They were no doubt carrying sticks masquerading as wands so that they would not be bothered by the more prejudiced members of the crowd.
Indeed, all the magical students and most of the school’s Squibs were present. The few students who did not have at least that touch of magic couldn’t attend, as they would become disoriented under Hogwarts’ wards. The non-magical staff was also not present, but the ten magical staff members were all there. As the girls and staff made their way into the section reserved for them, Lee continued his announcements.
“This year, three of the House teams had equally successful years. Hard luck to Ravenclaw, you failed to win a game, despite some good performances. The other three teams were each two and one. Hufflepuff’s Cedric Diggory was the only Seeker to catch the snitch in all three games, but unfortunately for Hufflepuff, Slytherin had too substantial a lead at that point, and catching the snitch was the only way to prevent Slytherin’s seeker from catching the snitch and causing what then would have been a very lopsided loss for Hufflepuff.”
After a pause, Jordon went on. “While Gryffindor claimed the Quidditch Cup due to a much better point differential, tonight’s game features Slytherin House as the home team.” Part of him would have preferred Gryffindor or even Hufflepuff playing. “So, for Slytherin: Chaser and Captain, Marcus Flint; Sixth year Chaser Charles Warrington and for this game Fifth year Chaser Adrian Pucey; Sixth year beaters Derrick Bole and John Derrick; for this game Fifth year Keeper John Montague;” Montague and Pucey switched between Chaser and Keeper, “and Third year Seeker, Draco Malfoy!” The Slytherins made a lot of noise while the rest of the Hogwarts people were supportive but less enthusiastic.
“And now for the ladies of St. Trinian’s, plus one! At Chaser, Captain Jane Stratham, Gillian Scully, and former Gryffindor Katie Bell! At Beater, Candace Coral and Jane Temple! At Keeper, Cynthia Coe! And at Seeker, former Gryffindor Harry Potter!”
After Madam Hooch made her usual warnings, the sneering Marcus Flint, who Harry had often thought of has having some troll ancestry, approached Jane Stratham, holding his hand out to shake (crush, more likely) hers. Instead, Stratham, who to Flint’s surprise was actually about half an inch taller than he was, held her hand out differently.
Flint had few manners, but a few had been drilled into his thick skull (he was, after all, in his eighth year at Hogwarts) by his maternal grandmother and a great aunt. Seeing how Stratham held her hand out, he had little choice but to take it and kiss her knuckles. They separated, Flint still confused about what had just happened.
Flint was still confused a few seconds later, when Hooch launched the balls into the air, starting what was the fastest, hardest-hitting school match any of the Hogwarts people had ever seen. The Slytherins were all on Nimbus 2001s, but the St. Trinian flyers were on Firebolts (except for the Keeper, who was on a more stable broom than either the Nimbus or the Firebolt). In addition, the Slytherin team had played three games that year, and had perhaps 20 hours of team flying practice that year. Slytherins spent much more time plotting and arguing than actually working out.
The St. Trinian players, however, had all played between 3 and 5 games at the school, had each played in at least three of the five interschool scrimmages (limited to forty-five minutes or the catching of the snitch), and had at least twenty-five hours of group flying practice that spring alone. Excepting Draco, each of the Slytherins carried more mass than of the St. Trinian flyers. Except for the St. Trinian Keeper, therefore, all the other St. Trinian flyers were not only lighter and on faster brooms, they were more experienced and more daring flyers. Over the first 35 minutes of the match, the Slytherin Chasers were never able to approach the St. Trinian Keeper with even numbers, let alone an advantage. They were forced to shoot either at a 1-2, 2-3, or 1-3 disadvantage, as the St. Trinian Chasers, and sometimes one of the Beaters, would already be between the Slytherins and the St. Trinian goals. The Slytherins managed to take 8 regular shots, but only one was successful.
The St. Trinian Chasers were then fast and nimble enough to either take the Quaffle from the Slytherins, or move a retrieved Quaffle from a missed shot to the other end of the field before the Slytherin Chasers could fully recover. They therefore usually approached the Slytherin goal with a 2 or even 3 to 1 advantage, with that one being one of the Slytherin Beaters. They took 21 regular shots, scoring 9.
The Chasers for both teams were very physical, and while the Slytherin beaters were stronger, the St. Trinian Beaters were strong enough, more agile, faster, and much more accurate. There was a great deal of bumping and blocking, resulting in four penalty shots in the first 35 minutes for each team. Each team converted one of their shots, so at that moment, the score was St. Trinian 100, Slytherin 20.
At that point, Harry managed to force Draco, who had been following far too fast and too close for his ability to react, to plow not only into one of the Beaters, but into Flint as well, while the Beater crashed into the Slytherin Keeper. The result, as the Slytherin flyers tried to regroup, two more goals for St. Trinian’s; 120-20.
Harry then added to the confusion over the next ten minutes, flying fearlessly into the scrum of Chasers, disrupting the Slytherins’ patterns and concentration, as well as drawing the Slytherin beaters into several mis-shots, striking their own players glancing hits. The St. Trinian Chasers managed 8 shots on goal, making three of them, while the Slytherins were unable to even get off one shot. St. Trinian therefore led 150-20 when Flint called his one non-injury time out.
The St. Trinian girls had been enthusiastic supporters this whole time, not only cheering but adding several rather rude chants some of them had learned at football matches. Only Miss Fritton, sitting in the back-most row so that she could keep an eye out for anyone threatening her girls, saw that Hermione, while somewhat concentrating on Harry’s flying, seemed to be thinking more than watching. She wondered what the girl was thinking. Well, obviously Miss Fritton knew Hermione was thinking about Harry. What she was thinking about her friend would have slightly surprised Miss Fritton, although it would have pleased her as well.
Most of the younger students (the under 16s) were interested in boys to some degree, (most of the 16-and-olders were interested in men, not boys) and Harry was the only boy at school. Except for a little teasing and flirting, most of the under-16s left Harry pretty much alone as well, as he just didn’t interest them.
For eighteen of the under-16s, though, Harry was of greater interest. Hermione had no problem with six of them, as they were not only all first years, one of the Squibs had only just turned eleven. (Some Squibs were taken in as young as 10.) All first years started off as ‘ducklings,’ encouraged to follow an older student of their choice. To have a duckling was an honor at St. Trinian’s, and you were expected to help them fit in and protect them. Harry, with six ‘ducklings,’ had more than any other individual, although both the Piranhas and the Totties had more in total.
Hermione could hardly complain about the next group of six, as she was one of them. Although some of them flirted with Harry a bit, they were more like Harry’s sisters and friends than (at least at the moment) romantic interests. Hermione and Luna were the only two from Hogwarts (and were the oldest and second youngest of that group), although Katie Bell was something of an older sister to all three.
Three of the remaining six worried Hermione. All three were Piranhas by nature as well as by Tribe, and Hermione, Katie, and even Luna agreed they were after Harry because of his status in the magical world rather than being interested in Harry for himself.
The Piranhas (as they had called themselves about three out of every five years since the Monty Python sketch had aired) were always the largest single tribe at St. Trinian’s, although they were far from a unified group. Many of the girls came from frankly criminal backgrounds, and included six of the nine current students whose families had no magical connections at all. Some of their fathers belonged to criminal organizations ranging from local gangs to old established organized crime families. Some were more independent professional criminals (safe-crackers, pick-pockets, con men); all of this section of the group from families of like background for many generations. Three families could trace their criminal ancestors back well into the 1700s. Others came from families of smugglers and other black marketers and fences, two dating back well into the 1400s. Family and professional rivalries kept their daughters from being too unified.
Three other tribes also had (at least according to ‘upright’ families outside of the school) shady connections. There was a gypsy/Traveler tribe which most students from those related ethnic groups joined almost automatically as well as the ‘Racers’ – from families involved in horse and dog racing and bookmaking. The Mechanics claimed to be most interested in car racing, but their families were as likely to be involved in auto theft as modifying engines. Those three groups helped balance the Piranhas, and the younger Racers ran the official gambling books for the school, while those in the middle years ran the school’s connections to professional gambling. Once it was clear that Harry was not interested in those three Piranhas (two Squibs and a magical), the Tribe had turned against him to a degree, although all three girls were still chasing him. While Harry was polite to all, he had learned to keep the three Piranhas chasing him at a distance. The Racers and Gypsies helped the Jocks (who had an interest in Harry because of Quidditch, plus Katie’s encouragement), the Geeks (pushed a bit by Hermione and to a lesser degree by Mandy), the Ecos, and the Wiccans helped insure the older Piranhas did not push too hard.
It helped Harry’s status (and his sanity) that he was powerful enough to have learned a few wandless spells the previous summer, and had added a few more since. None were particularly powerful (yet), but that access to wandless magic meant he was the one student able to use magic throughout the school despite the no-wand outside of the magical area rule. Since two of those spells were a stinger and, when needed, a stunner, while a third was a light shield, the girls after him (or after his friends or ducklings) soon learned not to cross a line. Harry, while nice, had been forced to learn to defend himself against girls magically, although he had so far held back physically.
As the Quidditch game progressed, Hermione found her attention, while mostly on Harry, was taking in the various girls interested in him. The remaining three girls were all witches between Harry’s age and her own. Dorothy Ross was a Totty, and reminded both Hermione and Harry of a cross between Ginny Weasley and Lavender Brown, and not in a good way. She was a red-head and a fan girl, more interested in gossip and makeup than anything else (including Harry). She was not as obviously out for what she could get out of Harry as the three Piranhas, but Hermione was still suspicious of her. She was also the most flirtatious towards Harry, even though it was obvious that made him uncomfortable.
Hermione, when not just a little interested in Harry for herself, rather hoped Harry might become more serious with one of the other two girls. However, when the Slytherin’s timeout ran out, she turned her full attention back to Harry for the moment.
Flint switched around Montague and Pucey, putting Pucey in goal. “Montague, clear your head and stay back to cover the goal. Warrington, those girls are faster than we are, but we’re stronger. We need to fly together tightly and out muscle them when we have the Quaffle. Bole, you stay between Montague and mid-field. Derrick, stay in front of him. Warrington and I will try to stay in the middle of the pitch, so you should be able to hit around us.” Flint glared at Draco. “Malfoy, either fly patterns away from Potter or do a better job containing him. If you do the first and he gets the Snitch because it was closer to him, well, that’s the luck of the game. If he gets it for any other reason, we will beat the shit out of you, kick you off the team, and then beat the shit out of you again once you recover. And,” he snapped when he saw Draco about to respond, “if you threaten me just one more time with Snape or your father, I won’t beat you, I’ll cripple you in ways even St. Mungo’s can’t fix. Understand?”
Even Draco had the sense to merely nod. The Slytherins took to the air, and when the teams were in position, play resumed.
The Slytherins were able to keep to their plan for some twelve minutes, and, other than the Seekers, the teams were able to play each other even. Each team had six shots, converting two of them, keeping the same margin by making the score 170-40. When Harry saw Draco take off to the opposite end of the pitch, however, he made his way there and spent that time in literally flying circles around Draco, but unable to draw him into making another bad move.
Over the next eight minutes, the superior conditioning of the St. Trinian squad again asserted itself, out shooting the Slytherins 6-3, and outscoring them 2-0. With the score now 190-40, if the margin stayed the same, the best Slytherin could accomplish was a tie.
Meanwhile, Hermione was considering the final two girls obviously interested in Harry. Amanda Hall was the more outgoing of the two, a petite, bubbly brunette. A member of the Jocks and not at all interested in academics (hardly novel at St. Trinian’s), she attended gymnastics training outside of school – not common for a St. Trinian or a British magical. Jane Belknap, blonde and freckled, was a hair shorter than Hermione and a shade bustier. Although both Amanda and Jane were magical, Amanda was of about average power, Jane slightly below. That was perhaps why Jane, although hardly a scholar in Hermione’s league, was slightly more interested in the mundane subjects than the magical despite being a Wiccan.
Meanwhile, Harry, who had been flying just to the right of Draco, managed to loop in front and over his opponent to catch the snitch which was just behind Draco’s left ear. The St. Trinians roared their approval while pounding the ends of their hockey or lacrosse sticks on the stands. As their team flew a victory lap, the girls sang a modified version of a new fight song some of them were working on:
We can’t fake the way we feel
We were born to keep it real
With broom sticks and balls of steel
We are St. Trinian’s
You bite us, we’ll bite you back
Better be scared when we attack
Feel the fear, we’re maniacs
St. Trinian’s
Check out our battle cry
A song to terrify
No one can stand in our way
We are the best, so screw the rest
We do as we damn well please
Until the end
St. Trinian’s
Defenders of anarchy!*
The girls then mobbed their team, congratulating them. Hermione was not the only girl surprised when, while Harry accepted hugs from most of the girls, and kisses on the cheek from a few of them, he kissed Jane Belknap back.
*
Defenders of Anarchy by Girls Aloud
By Dr. T
She-Who-Must-Be-Mentioned and her subsidiaries and partners own the Canon Potter-verse. Ronald Searle’s estate and various UK companies and associations own the St. Trinian rights. I indulged in crossing over by taking a hockey stick to the pair of them. The HP folks whinged a great deal, while the St. Trinian girls merely stuck out their collective tongues and offered me a shot of home brew – which might account for this fic, come to think about it.
*
Chapter 02 — Scenes from Harry’s Third Year.
“Harry WILL be coming back,” Dumbledore insisted. “Do you think your girls will have any protection against the Dementors? The Ministry will insist, to try and capture Sirius Black.”
“Ah, and now we come to the other reason why I allowed you entrance.”
The two looked puzzled, until they heard a voice behind them.
“Ah, Albus, Minnie. Surprised to see me?”
The pair swung around, and found themselves covered not only by a wand-wielding Sirius Black but three witches, armed the same way. “Prepare to hear a strange but true tale, Minnie.” His face hardened. “Then we’ll see how much Albus here already knew.”
As it transpired, while Dumbledore suspected a bit, he actually knew little of the truth. The Hogwarts pair was sent back to Hogwarts just over an hour later, without Harry but with a mandate to capture a rat. To the surprise of Camilla Fritton, who sometimes believed that few outside of the St. Trinian’s family (and not all that many within it) were capable, Peter Pettigrew would be unmasked that very evening at dinner, making Harry Potter’s transfer out of Hogwarts page three news, as the saga of Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black took up all of page one.
From there the scandal would spread. Remus Lupin was outed as a werewolf by Snape, causing him to leave Hogwarts by the end of that first weekend. Barty Crouch would be revealed to have smuggled his son out of Azkaban, thus ending his career, although the younger Crouch managed to escape custody. Fudge just managed to hang on to his job, but would be put under closer scrutiny. Lucius Malfoy and the others who had pled being under the ‘imperius’ took deeper cover. A faction centered on Madam Bones and Madam Longbottom took basic control of the government.
All that would transpire over the next two weeks. Once Dumbledore and McGonagall had left the grounds the morning after the transfer, and Sirius and the three witches who had been with him had also left, Miss Fritton sent for the Head Girl.
“You wanted to see me, Miss?”
“Ah, Miss Dawn, do come in and sit down. How are our new arrivals?”
“The Granger girl and Harry seem to have briefed them well, and all the girls but the Lovegood girl had some accurate knowledge of us before last spring. They made no complaints about the magic rules.” There were few rules at St. Trinian’s, but those few were strictly enforced. All wand usage was limited to the magic wing and the attached greenhouse, which held magical plants. Wands were not to be taken out of those areas barring emergencies.
“Good, good. Go on. They have all been provided copies of the drills?”
The school was a very unconventional, and to most outsiders, at best it was semi-organized chaos. It was quite amazing how much learning was somehow accomplished (granted, there was at least as much unconventional learning going on outside of classes as standard learning inside them). Except when the O.W.L./N.E.W.T. examiners were present, however, the magical side of officialdom rarely intruded. Intrusion from the Muggle side, especially the various education authorities, was more common. A series of drills insured that the school could be made presentable to official Muggle eyes on very short notice.
“Yes, they have. They seem to be adapting better than most of the older first arrivals do. Well, Harry got quite a bit of teasing. . . .”
Miss Fritton smiled. “As the only male under thirty who will be consistently here, he had best get used to it.”
“Yes, well, Granger and Bell took exception to that, and they would have been in for it, except, well. . . .”
“Yes?”
“Harry is going to become a right powerful wizard,” Barbara Dawn replied. “His magic flared, even though he didn’t have his wand out. To be frank, he scared the crap out of quite a few of us.”
“Miss Dawn! Language!” Fritton frowned. “Unless you were speaking literally?”
“Very literal!”
“Oh, dear. Miss Jacobs again?”
“And more than a dozen others, including the chief spiv!”
“They are calling themselves the Piranhas again now, I believe. Well, if Miss Hopkins had an accident, then we will excuse Miss Jacobs, although I had hoped that new potion would help her problem.”
“I think it did, a bit, Miss. At least compared to some of the others!”
“Well, that is some success, I suppose. I am sure the house elves cleaned up well last night, and will be willing to do some early laundering. Have any of the girls been adopted into the tribes yet?” St. Trinian’s did not have houses, but the girls, by the end of their first year, were adopted into unofficial tribes. Some of the tribes were constant over the years, others came and went. Girls sometimes transferred to new groups at the beginning of each term.
“Actually, they all have been.”
“Already?” Miss Fritton was surprised.
“Yeah, I mean, yes. Granger is a natural swot, even though she doesn’t have the technical background to be a Geek, at least not yet. Still, they’re happy to have her and Brocklehurst. They’ll both catch up in no time.”
“Go on.”
“The little Lovegood girl was taken into the Ecos. Talbot is a Totty, while French made Totty-in-training.” Unless they developed very fast, most girls had to be fifteen to be an official Totty. The hottest two or three in their last year would run the group as the Hot Totties, although there was talk in the group to call themselves the Hot Totties and the leaders Posh Totties. “Davis will likely be running the spivs, I mean, the Piranhas, by the end of next year. Perks, Moon, and Jones rather defaulted.”
“Well, dear, if our girls can’t be Wiccans, who can?”
“Very true, Miss.”
“Miss Bell, I take it, joined the jocks?”
“Yes, Miss. I think she’ll be an excellent addition to the field hockey team.”
“Ask her, Miss Statham, and Miss Coral to see me when we’re through. I believe we will be having a Quidditch game next spring at Hogwarts.”
“Very good, Miss Fritton.” Dawn seemed to hesitate.
“Yes?”
“Is it true that Harry killed a giant basilisk at Hogwarts last spring?”
Miss Fritton smiled. “It is. The Headmaster of Hogwarts will be getting notice from the goblins next week, staking Harry’s claim. It will no doubt add to his aggravation.”
*
It was Friday, September 10, before Harry was allowed to invite Hermione to his quarters, so the pair could catch up in private. Most weeknights, Harry had to be out of the school proper between 8:00 in the evening and 7:00 the next morning; 10:00 and 7:00 on other nights. As stated, there were few rules at St. Trinian’s, but that was a firm one (at least until Harry was older). Likewise, Hermione was not allowed into the private quarters without both Harry’s and Miss Fritton’s permission.
Miss Fritton was out, but had allowed Hermione to visit Harry starting at four for a light tea. Hermione would then join Harry and his cousin for dinner. Miss Fritton usually ate breakfast and lunch with the students and any staff who wished to in the dining hall. However, two or three nights a week, and most Sunday afternoons, she dined in her quarters with various students and staff. Over the 6-8 years most students spent at St. Trinian’s, any given student would dine with the headmistress at least five times. Friday nights, however, Miss Fritton was usually dining out, keeping up the networking needed to protect St. Trinian’s within the wider world. Harry wondered about this deviation, but had learned enough over the summer to realize that if it affected him, he would be told.
“We haven’t had much time to talk,” Harry said, pouring tea for Hermione, to her surprise. “How are you settling in, now that you’re here?”
Hermione added a touch of lemon to her tea while thinking that over. She realized that Harry had had much of the summer to think things over and come to terms with the culture of their new school. Due to their various ‘at home’ situations, there were usually between 15-30 girls who stayed over most or all of the summer. This past summer, there had been 18, and they had given Harry a taste of what the regular terms would be like.
Finally, Hermione confessed, “I’m not sure which is the more odd: how chaotic the instruction is, or the fact that we are learning so much despite of it.”
“That’s part of the magic of St. Trinian’s,” Harry said. Seeing the look on Hermione’s face, Harry went on, “Well, from what Miss Black and the Headmistress told me, Hogwarts is located at one of the most magical places in Britain. Did Hogwarts: A History mention it was built over one of the major stone circles left by The Old Ones?”
“No,” Hermione almost growled, “it didn’t.”
“A great deal of the ambient magic, and the magic expended by the students over the years, go into powering things like the portraits and the gargoyle guarding the headmaster’s suite, the Sorting Hat, and even the very castle itself, which is nearly as aware as the Sorting Hat. That’s in addition to hidden magical defenses which should come into play if the castle is attacked, and all that on top of the wards. Where Hogwarts was built over a sacrificial circle, St. Trinian’s was built over a sacred spring, very different magic. Here, other than the wards, the magic is channeled to the school and then back into the students. On top of that, the magic expended here is slightly different than the total magic expended at Hogwarts.”
“In what way, Harry?”
“Well, Miss Black claims that while the magic men have and the magic women have are over ninety-five percent the same, they are slightly different in some ways. Most of the difference is supposed to complement each other, but there is also some conflict. The conflicts between the magics cause disturbances which Hogwarts draws upon to generate the sentience of the castle and some of the defensive wards. Here, the overwhelming magic is female, and that while women are in many ways as competitive as men, their, well, your unique magics work better for sharing.”
“So, despite the seeming chaos, we learn better here because the feminine magic is helping us?” Hermione asked doubtfully.
Harry shrugged. “So they claim, anyway. I have no idea if that’s why it works that way, or how it works even if they’re correct. Still, they believe it, and so the Headmistress said there could be no more than five active male magic users here on a day-to-day basis, and ten of the magically-touched.”
Hermione thought. “Well, right now you’re the only wizard, and only three of the six men on the regular staff are Squ, I mean, magically touched. We do need at least more magical instructor, though.”
“That’s where Miss Fritton is right now, or at least that’s what she said.” Harry thought a moment, and then asked, “Is it difficult in the dorms?”
Hermione shook her head. “Not really. Actually, there are only two dorm areas, one for the magic users in the magic wing, and the rest are in the attics upstairs. There are ninety-three of us, and even though there is less privacy, there is actually a bit more personal space than at Hogwarts.”
The two drank tea quietly for a moment, Harry enjoying the company and Hermione enjoying the company and the quiet, the latter being something St. Trinian’s was certainly not known for. Finally, Hermione looked at Harry, trying to frame a question.
“The basilisk, or Sirius Black?” he asked.
“Both,” Hermione admitted. “I was trying to decide which to ask about first.”
“I was snuck into Hogwarts yesterday morning, along with a team from Gringotts – Dumbledore didn’t want the students to know about it. They should have finished with the snake today, and be finished cleaning out the whole subterranean area sometime tomorrow. Myrtle’s bathroom is permanently closed, as the entrances to the underground area and to the Chamber are being left open for a while, so that the Hogwarts people can decide what to do about it.”
“What are they doing with the snake?”
“Basilisk parts are worth a lot of money. I found out this summer that I come into a nice estate, phased in by stages starting when I’m seventeen and ending when I’m twenty-five, so I don’t need all of it. Gringotts gets a fifth for processing everything, shoring up the subterranean areas, handling the sales, and so on. After that, I’ll take two shares of the rest – I was going to get four, but I’m donating one to St. Trinian’s – Hogwarts gets two shares, and that other share is being divided between those of you who were petrified, plus Ron and Ginny.”
“You didn’t have to do that!”
Harry shrugged. “It felt right.”
“So I’ll get a little more than two percent of the proceeds from the basilisk. . . .”
“Plus anything else found down there,” Harry pointed out.
“. . . . just for being petrified? That doesn’t seem right.”
Harry shrugged. “Like I said, sharing felt right. If anything, you should have gotten more, since you helped solve the problem. If the basilisk sales are about what they think they will be, and there isn’t anything else, you should get between eight and eleven thousand Galleons over the next few years.”
“That’s a lot,” Hermione stated, a bit surprised.
Harry shrugged it off. “As for Black, his trial was this morning, and he got off. Cousin Camilla has my custody, though, and I’m happy here, so that won’t be affected. Since Snape got Professor Lupin fired, and he’s supposed to be an old friend of Black as well as my parents, the Headmistress thought the pair would likely go off together so Black can recover from Azkaban and being on the run.”
Hermione noted the different terms for Miss Fritton Harry used, depending on the situation, and decided that was probably wise.
“Nonsense, Harry.”
The two students stood up, slightly surprised that they had not heard anyone enter. Miss Fritton came in and sat, and allowed Harry to pour her tea. “You are settling in well, I hear, Miss Granger.”
“Thank you, Miss.”
Fritton sipped her tea and, looking over the cup at Hermione, asked, “Something still bothers you about us, though.”
Hermione frowned, but while not wanting to question the Headmistress, she was both curious and concerned. “The approach to things is just so different from what I am used to, both from Primary school and Hogwarts, which were different enough from each other.”
“Were they really all that different in their actual methods, dear? I grant you the differences in subjects, but in fundamental approach?” Seeing the confusion of Hermione’s face, she continued, “At Hogwarts, the Headmaster has tried to have you taught that the world is divided into Light and Dark, or good and evil. There is of course some truth to that, but only some. We at St. Trinian’s look at the tendencies of the world as being more divided into Order and Chaos, and in their extremes both are bad, although not necessarily evil. At its extreme, as personified by either Dumbledore or Voldemort, Order means stagnation; an unchanging world. It would be the Order of Grindelwald in the magical world, the Nazis or Communists of the mundane. Granted, the Order of Voldemort or Grindelwald would mean chains and extreme oppression of, well, everything. The Order of Dumbledore's world would be a velvet and silk straightjacket, but in reality, under the surface, it is still oppression.”
“Really?” Hermione asked.
“Yes. Look at all your courses at Hogwarts. Like your primary school, all the instructors claim to teach the ‘best way’ to approach their subjects, but they will only consider one way, the way they were taught, or the way the system they were and are teaching in way to look at things. Granted, in your primary school, there was likely a variety of ‘best ways,’ as the fashions and fads of mundane education change nearly as fast and as facilely as their fashions.” Miss Fritton smiled. “To stick with the magical, however, I am sure you can easily see how Potions and History at Hogwarts fell into that line, but Transfiguration and Charms merely have better instructors. Astronomy, Herbology and so on are taught the same way they were taught a century or more ago. Muggle Studies still look at how the Purebloods viewed the mundane world around 1900, and that agelessness is reflected in all the courses.”
Hermione was speechless.
“Chaos is meaninglessness even more extreme than the oppression of a Voldemort-led world. We strive for extreme innovation here at St. Trinian's. At first, it may seem chaotic, but it is not. It is perhaps anarchic; that is, it is extreme innovation within the confines of the attempts at extreme Order the outside world tries to straightjacket us into. You will learn the 'correct' way of viewing and doing things, but only as you learn other ways to do those things, and even more. Unlike Hogwarts, we do not train our students to be rule-loving administrators and pompous aristocrats. Children in Order-oriented schools are given an idealized image of the world and then thrust them, unsuspecting, out into the very disorderly, selfish, and even cruel world unprepared. St. Trinian's sends her children out into that world well-prepared, which is usually unprepared for such children. The world is our oyster, and you, unlike the students of Hogwarts, will know how to get to the most of the pearls.”
There was a knock on the door, and Miss Fritton called them in. “Are we pearls, too, or just swine?” a man said. Hermione and Harry turned towards the voice and saw Black and Lupin were standing in the doorway.
“That remains to be seen,” Miss Fritton stated. She turned to Harry. “I believe I said they would be together, but I do not believe I said they would go off anywhere. In any event, please meet our two new magical tutors, Mister Black and Mister Lupin. I believe they, unlike most wizards, will fit into St. Trinian’s very nicely.”
After the three guests had left, Miss Fritton looked at her cousin. “Your friend is having the most difficult time settling in so far of all our Hogwarts transfers, although she is doing fairly well academically.”
Harry shrugged. “She finds comfort in order and routine. When she gets used to St. Trinian’s, that will be her routine, no matter how chaotic, excuse me, anarchic, it would seem to anyone else.”
“That’s what I thought,” Fritton agreed with a smile. “It will come together for her and all the girls on All Hallows Eve.”
“That ritual. . . .”
“We are a coven of witches, Harry,” Fritton reminded him, “even those here without any touch of magic. On two nights a year, we act as such. We are not ‘dark’, let alone satanic.”
“I know,” Harry agreed, as this had all been explained to him that summer. He gestured at his scar.
“Yes, once the coven is together, we will be able to deal with that the next evening, no matter how evil it may be.”
*
Friday, November, 18, 1993
“Good afternoon, Camilla,” Dumbledore said as the witch exited the floo into his office. “What may I do for you?”
“In truth,” she replied, dusting herself off, “on the whole I am here to supply you with some information. However, I would hope you will be truthful in answering some questions for me afterwards.”
Worried, Dumbledore showed her to a chair and offered tea from a service the elves had delivered just before his visitor had arrived.
“Thank you,” Fritton said, taking a cup. Her eyes hardened. “I am certain that, at least after the events of late last spring if not long before, you were aware Harry housed a Horcrux, or more accurately, a partial Horcrux.”
Dumbledore sighed. He very much wished he could Obliviate that knowledge, but doubted she was the only one who now possessed it. “That was one of several possibilities I thought of, back in 1981. As you say, the diary makes it rather more certain.”
“Made it,” Fritton stated. “We removed and destroyed the soul fragment in a ritual on the eve of All Souls.”
Dumbledore sat back on his throne-like chair, slack-jawed and stunned.
“Ah, we rather thought you had, as your reputation would suggest, consulted no one other than yourself. Exorcising the soul fragment was rather easy, in fact. Now, before we did so, we managed to extract a fair amount of information from it. That,” Miss Fritton had to state, “was by far much more difficult.”
“Information? Anything on the remaining four Horcruxes?”
“Five,” Miss Fritton stated.
“Five? I thought he’d have seven fragments in total, six Horcruxes and the main spirit fragment.”
“Tom Riddle was brilliant in many ways, but he still was likely mad long before he made his first Horcrux. He was certainly insane afterwards. We had certain information on four, and those have been tracked down and destroyed.” Dumbledore was even more shocked. “I am afraid destroying the Horcrux also destroyed the magic in these objects.” Out of her large purse, Miss Fritton pulled Hufflepuff’s chalice (recovered with the aid of the goblin girls who had attended St. Trinian’s) and Ravenclaw’s diadem. (Recovered with help from Dobby, who had been working at Hogwarts until he had delivered the diadem. He now worked at St. Trinian’s.) She did not mention that Sirius had given the locket to his half-mad elf, and Harry now had the ring.
“We were unable to scry much about the last Horcrux. It seems to be, or more likely be contained inside, a rather large serpent of some sort, somewhere to the southeast. Italy or the Balkans perhaps?” She shrugged. “In any case, he cannot make any more without limiting his ability to animate any sort of body he is able to reconstruct for himself. It is also uncertain if one anchor would be enough to keep his soul in this world if he were to be banished again, considering how small a fragment his consciousness is housed with.” She gave Dumbledore a hard look. “Any questions, Albus?”
“I confess my amazement, Camilla.”
“No doubt. Why was the cottage the Potters were hiding in not examined?”
Dumbledore frowned. “I thought it had been.”
“If so, it was very poorly done. Voldemort had a dirk, one matching that sword you so proudly display, prepared to house his Horcrux. When he was blasted by the reflected Killing Curse, for some reason the fragment he had prepared to become the Horcrux was damaged enough that some lodged in that scar of Harry’s, and some was in the knife. Neither was likely strong enough to anchor Voldemort. Still, the dirk was certainly next to Harry’s head when the curse was cast, but it bounced down to the floor, between the crib and the wall. It was still there last Saturday, when we recovered it.”
Fritton pulled the dirk out of her handbag with a polyester handkerchief and set it on Dumbledore’s desk. “That handkerchief is made out of artificial material, and is magically inert. Touching the dirk without it or something similar would be at least somewhat dangerous.” She pulled out a sheet of paper with typewritten instructions. “This will show you how to use the dirk as a Voldemort detector, although for any accuracy it would have to be within a hundred miles or so. It should also detect the final Horcrux at thirty miles, and any Dark mark nearby. We have also listened to the so-called prophecy, and the expert opinion is that it is a useless pile of dragon droppings.”
Dumbledore was unable to respond.
“No doubt Voldemort will make attempts on Harry. I hold you responsible for destroying the Dark Lord.”
“But. . . .” Dumbledore protested.
“Tell me, did Tom Riddle regard you as a mentor?”
“Certainly not! He didn’t regard anyone. . . .” He stopped.
“There you are, then. A power ‘he knew not’. I am certain you can easily come up with several more, after you consider these.” She handed him another sheet of paper. “There you are, Albus, thirty-seven different possible ‘powers he knows not’ which would NOT involve Harry confronting him a fourth time in person!”
“I will of course consider them all, and try to add to them,” Dumbledore had to admit.
Fritton gave him a nod of satisfaction. “Now, on to a totally different matter. Do you have any decision on a Quidditch match in the spring? It would so help the girls sort out a set team.”
“Severus was very interested, if for the wrong reasons,” Dumbledore had to admit.
“Ah, he learned I was headmistress, and is hoping to humiliate myself, Harry, and, being the sexist swine he is, my girls as well.”
Dumbledore winced. “I would not have put it so bluntly, but alas, you are essentially correct, especially on the first two points.” He looked up. “I warn you, Slytherin plays rough.”
Fritton merely smiled. “Oh, I do hope so.”
*
June, 1994
“Ladies, Gentlemen, and Slytherins. . . .”
“Mister Jordan!”
“Sorry. Welcome to the first inter-school Quidditch match at Hogwarts since 1974!”
The students and guests applauded.
“Headmaster Dumbledore is setting down the portkey target, and we await the staff and girls of St. Trinian’s, plus one!”
Many of the Muggle-raised chuckled slightly as an enormous bubble appeared above the pitch, and slowly floated down to settle on the ground, revealing the St. Trinian group. Miss Fritton was not dressed as Glenda, however. She and her staff were in their regular Muggle dress, the students in their gymslips, boaters, and, because of the cool Scottish weather, matching jumpers. The team however, was in a hodge-podge of makeshift uniforms and mismatched Quidditch pads, but with armbands in St. Trinian colors. Oddly, the non-playing students (except for the three carrying the three different St. Trinian banners) were all carrying hockey or lacrosse sticks in their left hands and wands in their right.
Dumbledore was startled at the sheer number of St. Trinian girls present, until he realized that over half had to be Squibs. They were no doubt carrying sticks masquerading as wands so that they would not be bothered by the more prejudiced members of the crowd.
Indeed, all the magical students and most of the school’s Squibs were present. The few students who did not have at least that touch of magic couldn’t attend, as they would become disoriented under Hogwarts’ wards. The non-magical staff was also not present, but the ten magical staff members were all there. As the girls and staff made their way into the section reserved for them, Lee continued his announcements.
“This year, three of the House teams had equally successful years. Hard luck to Ravenclaw, you failed to win a game, despite some good performances. The other three teams were each two and one. Hufflepuff’s Cedric Diggory was the only Seeker to catch the snitch in all three games, but unfortunately for Hufflepuff, Slytherin had too substantial a lead at that point, and catching the snitch was the only way to prevent Slytherin’s seeker from catching the snitch and causing what then would have been a very lopsided loss for Hufflepuff.”
After a pause, Jordon went on. “While Gryffindor claimed the Quidditch Cup due to a much better point differential, tonight’s game features Slytherin House as the home team.” Part of him would have preferred Gryffindor or even Hufflepuff playing. “So, for Slytherin: Chaser and Captain, Marcus Flint; Sixth year Chaser Charles Warrington and for this game Fifth year Chaser Adrian Pucey; Sixth year beaters Derrick Bole and John Derrick; for this game Fifth year Keeper John Montague;” Montague and Pucey switched between Chaser and Keeper, “and Third year Seeker, Draco Malfoy!” The Slytherins made a lot of noise while the rest of the Hogwarts people were supportive but less enthusiastic.
“And now for the ladies of St. Trinian’s, plus one! At Chaser, Captain Jane Stratham, Gillian Scully, and former Gryffindor Katie Bell! At Beater, Candace Coral and Jane Temple! At Keeper, Cynthia Coe! And at Seeker, former Gryffindor Harry Potter!”
After Madam Hooch made her usual warnings, the sneering Marcus Flint, who Harry had often thought of has having some troll ancestry, approached Jane Stratham, holding his hand out to shake (crush, more likely) hers. Instead, Stratham, who to Flint’s surprise was actually about half an inch taller than he was, held her hand out differently.
Flint had few manners, but a few had been drilled into his thick skull (he was, after all, in his eighth year at Hogwarts) by his maternal grandmother and a great aunt. Seeing how Stratham held her hand out, he had little choice but to take it and kiss her knuckles. They separated, Flint still confused about what had just happened.
Flint was still confused a few seconds later, when Hooch launched the balls into the air, starting what was the fastest, hardest-hitting school match any of the Hogwarts people had ever seen. The Slytherins were all on Nimbus 2001s, but the St. Trinian flyers were on Firebolts (except for the Keeper, who was on a more stable broom than either the Nimbus or the Firebolt). In addition, the Slytherin team had played three games that year, and had perhaps 20 hours of team flying practice that year. Slytherins spent much more time plotting and arguing than actually working out.
The St. Trinian players, however, had all played between 3 and 5 games at the school, had each played in at least three of the five interschool scrimmages (limited to forty-five minutes or the catching of the snitch), and had at least twenty-five hours of group flying practice that spring alone. Excepting Draco, each of the Slytherins carried more mass than of the St. Trinian flyers. Except for the St. Trinian Keeper, therefore, all the other St. Trinian flyers were not only lighter and on faster brooms, they were more experienced and more daring flyers. Over the first 35 minutes of the match, the Slytherin Chasers were never able to approach the St. Trinian Keeper with even numbers, let alone an advantage. They were forced to shoot either at a 1-2, 2-3, or 1-3 disadvantage, as the St. Trinian Chasers, and sometimes one of the Beaters, would already be between the Slytherins and the St. Trinian goals. The Slytherins managed to take 8 regular shots, but only one was successful.
The St. Trinian Chasers were then fast and nimble enough to either take the Quaffle from the Slytherins, or move a retrieved Quaffle from a missed shot to the other end of the field before the Slytherin Chasers could fully recover. They therefore usually approached the Slytherin goal with a 2 or even 3 to 1 advantage, with that one being one of the Slytherin Beaters. They took 21 regular shots, scoring 9.
The Chasers for both teams were very physical, and while the Slytherin beaters were stronger, the St. Trinian Beaters were strong enough, more agile, faster, and much more accurate. There was a great deal of bumping and blocking, resulting in four penalty shots in the first 35 minutes for each team. Each team converted one of their shots, so at that moment, the score was St. Trinian 100, Slytherin 20.
At that point, Harry managed to force Draco, who had been following far too fast and too close for his ability to react, to plow not only into one of the Beaters, but into Flint as well, while the Beater crashed into the Slytherin Keeper. The result, as the Slytherin flyers tried to regroup, two more goals for St. Trinian’s; 120-20.
Harry then added to the confusion over the next ten minutes, flying fearlessly into the scrum of Chasers, disrupting the Slytherins’ patterns and concentration, as well as drawing the Slytherin beaters into several mis-shots, striking their own players glancing hits. The St. Trinian Chasers managed 8 shots on goal, making three of them, while the Slytherins were unable to even get off one shot. St. Trinian therefore led 150-20 when Flint called his one non-injury time out.
The St. Trinian girls had been enthusiastic supporters this whole time, not only cheering but adding several rather rude chants some of them had learned at football matches. Only Miss Fritton, sitting in the back-most row so that she could keep an eye out for anyone threatening her girls, saw that Hermione, while somewhat concentrating on Harry’s flying, seemed to be thinking more than watching. She wondered what the girl was thinking. Well, obviously Miss Fritton knew Hermione was thinking about Harry. What she was thinking about her friend would have slightly surprised Miss Fritton, although it would have pleased her as well.
Most of the younger students (the under 16s) were interested in boys to some degree, (most of the 16-and-olders were interested in men, not boys) and Harry was the only boy at school. Except for a little teasing and flirting, most of the under-16s left Harry pretty much alone as well, as he just didn’t interest them.
For eighteen of the under-16s, though, Harry was of greater interest. Hermione had no problem with six of them, as they were not only all first years, one of the Squibs had only just turned eleven. (Some Squibs were taken in as young as 10.) All first years started off as ‘ducklings,’ encouraged to follow an older student of their choice. To have a duckling was an honor at St. Trinian’s, and you were expected to help them fit in and protect them. Harry, with six ‘ducklings,’ had more than any other individual, although both the Piranhas and the Totties had more in total.
Hermione could hardly complain about the next group of six, as she was one of them. Although some of them flirted with Harry a bit, they were more like Harry’s sisters and friends than (at least at the moment) romantic interests. Hermione and Luna were the only two from Hogwarts (and were the oldest and second youngest of that group), although Katie Bell was something of an older sister to all three.
Three of the remaining six worried Hermione. All three were Piranhas by nature as well as by Tribe, and Hermione, Katie, and even Luna agreed they were after Harry because of his status in the magical world rather than being interested in Harry for himself.
The Piranhas (as they had called themselves about three out of every five years since the Monty Python sketch had aired) were always the largest single tribe at St. Trinian’s, although they were far from a unified group. Many of the girls came from frankly criminal backgrounds, and included six of the nine current students whose families had no magical connections at all. Some of their fathers belonged to criminal organizations ranging from local gangs to old established organized crime families. Some were more independent professional criminals (safe-crackers, pick-pockets, con men); all of this section of the group from families of like background for many generations. Three families could trace their criminal ancestors back well into the 1700s. Others came from families of smugglers and other black marketers and fences, two dating back well into the 1400s. Family and professional rivalries kept their daughters from being too unified.
Three other tribes also had (at least according to ‘upright’ families outside of the school) shady connections. There was a gypsy/Traveler tribe which most students from those related ethnic groups joined almost automatically as well as the ‘Racers’ – from families involved in horse and dog racing and bookmaking. The Mechanics claimed to be most interested in car racing, but their families were as likely to be involved in auto theft as modifying engines. Those three groups helped balance the Piranhas, and the younger Racers ran the official gambling books for the school, while those in the middle years ran the school’s connections to professional gambling. Once it was clear that Harry was not interested in those three Piranhas (two Squibs and a magical), the Tribe had turned against him to a degree, although all three girls were still chasing him. While Harry was polite to all, he had learned to keep the three Piranhas chasing him at a distance. The Racers and Gypsies helped the Jocks (who had an interest in Harry because of Quidditch, plus Katie’s encouragement), the Geeks (pushed a bit by Hermione and to a lesser degree by Mandy), the Ecos, and the Wiccans helped insure the older Piranhas did not push too hard.
It helped Harry’s status (and his sanity) that he was powerful enough to have learned a few wandless spells the previous summer, and had added a few more since. None were particularly powerful (yet), but that access to wandless magic meant he was the one student able to use magic throughout the school despite the no-wand outside of the magical area rule. Since two of those spells were a stinger and, when needed, a stunner, while a third was a light shield, the girls after him (or after his friends or ducklings) soon learned not to cross a line. Harry, while nice, had been forced to learn to defend himself against girls magically, although he had so far held back physically.
As the Quidditch game progressed, Hermione found her attention, while mostly on Harry, was taking in the various girls interested in him. The remaining three girls were all witches between Harry’s age and her own. Dorothy Ross was a Totty, and reminded both Hermione and Harry of a cross between Ginny Weasley and Lavender Brown, and not in a good way. She was a red-head and a fan girl, more interested in gossip and makeup than anything else (including Harry). She was not as obviously out for what she could get out of Harry as the three Piranhas, but Hermione was still suspicious of her. She was also the most flirtatious towards Harry, even though it was obvious that made him uncomfortable.
Hermione, when not just a little interested in Harry for herself, rather hoped Harry might become more serious with one of the other two girls. However, when the Slytherin’s timeout ran out, she turned her full attention back to Harry for the moment.
Flint switched around Montague and Pucey, putting Pucey in goal. “Montague, clear your head and stay back to cover the goal. Warrington, those girls are faster than we are, but we’re stronger. We need to fly together tightly and out muscle them when we have the Quaffle. Bole, you stay between Montague and mid-field. Derrick, stay in front of him. Warrington and I will try to stay in the middle of the pitch, so you should be able to hit around us.” Flint glared at Draco. “Malfoy, either fly patterns away from Potter or do a better job containing him. If you do the first and he gets the Snitch because it was closer to him, well, that’s the luck of the game. If he gets it for any other reason, we will beat the shit out of you, kick you off the team, and then beat the shit out of you again once you recover. And,” he snapped when he saw Draco about to respond, “if you threaten me just one more time with Snape or your father, I won’t beat you, I’ll cripple you in ways even St. Mungo’s can’t fix. Understand?”
Even Draco had the sense to merely nod. The Slytherins took to the air, and when the teams were in position, play resumed.
The Slytherins were able to keep to their plan for some twelve minutes, and, other than the Seekers, the teams were able to play each other even. Each team had six shots, converting two of them, keeping the same margin by making the score 170-40. When Harry saw Draco take off to the opposite end of the pitch, however, he made his way there and spent that time in literally flying circles around Draco, but unable to draw him into making another bad move.
Over the next eight minutes, the superior conditioning of the St. Trinian squad again asserted itself, out shooting the Slytherins 6-3, and outscoring them 2-0. With the score now 190-40, if the margin stayed the same, the best Slytherin could accomplish was a tie.
Meanwhile, Hermione was considering the final two girls obviously interested in Harry. Amanda Hall was the more outgoing of the two, a petite, bubbly brunette. A member of the Jocks and not at all interested in academics (hardly novel at St. Trinian’s), she attended gymnastics training outside of school – not common for a St. Trinian or a British magical. Jane Belknap, blonde and freckled, was a hair shorter than Hermione and a shade bustier. Although both Amanda and Jane were magical, Amanda was of about average power, Jane slightly below. That was perhaps why Jane, although hardly a scholar in Hermione’s league, was slightly more interested in the mundane subjects than the magical despite being a Wiccan.
Meanwhile, Harry, who had been flying just to the right of Draco, managed to loop in front and over his opponent to catch the snitch which was just behind Draco’s left ear. The St. Trinians roared their approval while pounding the ends of their hockey or lacrosse sticks on the stands. As their team flew a victory lap, the girls sang a modified version of a new fight song some of them were working on:
We can’t fake the way we feel
We were born to keep it real
With broom sticks and balls of steel
We are St. Trinian’s
You bite us, we’ll bite you back
Better be scared when we attack
Feel the fear, we’re maniacs
St. Trinian’s
Check out our battle cry
A song to terrify
No one can stand in our way
We are the best, so screw the rest
We do as we damn well please
Until the end
St. Trinian’s
Defenders of anarchy!*
The girls then mobbed their team, congratulating them. Hermione was not the only girl surprised when, while Harry accepted hugs from most of the girls, and kisses on the cheek from a few of them, he kissed Jane Belknap back.
*
Defenders of Anarchy by Girls Aloud
Sign up to rate and review this story