Categories > Original > Humor
Note: This fanfic takes place after the events that occured in Naked To the Limit One More Time.
American Dad!
Fanfic Title:
Very Ape!
By: Trenton Sands
Opening Credits Scene:
Roger's Disguise: Max Jets
Scene 1:
In Roger's attic at the Smith house, Roger was on the phone while Klaus was on the internet.
Roger (on phone): Mmm, Hmm? Yes. What? (combatively) What do you mean, you need to know my name? Fine! It's Roc..ky...Denn....is......Rockford Files! Yes, my name is Rockford Files! I live in a trailer on the beach with my father, I fought in the Korean War. Then I used to be a con man and went to prison through no fault of my own, I have issues with my ex-cellmate named Angel. Sure. Where do you live? Chimdale? In a mansion? Can do! We'll be right over! (jumping up and down and causing a shake) YES!!! YES!! YES!! I did it! I did it!
Klaus (wheeling himself in a half bowl): What are you doing? Reenacting a late 90's Geico commercial? Keep it down in here! I'm writing a Brickleberry fanfic!
Roger: That show's only been on for one season, and you're already writing fanfics? I thought you can't read.
Klaus: Actually, I can. Just saying that to get attention. Why are you so happy about that you had to interupt me?
Roger: I just got my first client for my Chimney Sweeping Business! And you're coming with me!
Klaus: Oh, Mein God. Always dragged along with your kooky situations!
Roger (grabs Klaus): And you're going to be my dumbass helper!
Klaus and Roger both dressed in derbies, white blouses and black overalls. Roger also had a Charlie Chaplin moustache on. Roger then drives to Chimdale on a truck that says Out Of This World Chimney Sweepers! The Best Chimney Sweepers in Langley Falls! The truck also had a UFO and a planet on it. As they were driving, Roger and Klaus have the radio blaring. They both sing along to Badfinger's No Matter What.
Roger and Klaus (singing): No Matter What You Are! I Will Always Be With You! Doesn't Matter What You Do Girl! Ooh, Girl With You! No Matter What You Do, I Will Always Always Be Around, No Matter......
Pete Ham (though the radio): HEY! Would you two shut the (beep) up and let me sing?
Roger (turns off radio): Thought rock stars loved it when fans sang their songs.
Scene 2:
Roger and Klaus finally arrive in Chimdale. The place they are at is in the slums and the mansion is in the middle of it.
Klaus: Wow! Love this place! This was something I hoped to live in when I was in Germany.
Roger: No surprise there. (rings the doorbell) Out of This World Chimney Sweepers!
Two men answered and it was two black men wearing lab coats and had afros.
Man #1: What cho want?
Klaus: We're the Chimney Sweepers you asked for.
Roger: Rockford Files! At your service! What's your name?
Man #1: My name is Dr. Afrostein, and this is my assistant....
Roger: Let me guess, Benson, right?! Like the black butler from Soap?
Man #1: No his name is Jivefunk!
Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk lead Roger and Klaus to the living room where the fireplace was.
Roger: Oh, my god? (snickers) Is your last name, Afrostein?
Dr. Afrostein: Yeah, that's what I said, foo!
Roger: Are you a Black Jew?
Dr. Afrostein: Yeah, what of it?
Roger: No way! Get out! A Black Jew? Boy do I have a song for you! (sings to the tune of The Beatles Blackbird): Black Jew singing in the dead of night......take these broken.....
Dr. Afrostein: Silence! We don't allow that Lennon/McCartney honkey jive 'round here!
Jivefink: We only listen to the funky stuff! Like Earth Wind and Fire, The Spinners, George Clinton and the Paralement, The Isley Brothers The Commandores, Isaac Hayes, The Temptations, Barry White, and Boz Scaggs! Wall of sound, baby!
Klaus: Was your Poppa a Rolling Stone? Is Carlos Santana funky, too?
Dr. Afrostein: Shut up! Go in there and get yo asses to work!
As Roger and Klaus ready to get to work on the chimney they were snickering and laughing at their clients.
Klaus: They're stuck in the 1970's! Too much Sweet Sweetbacks Blaxploitation films for them!
Roger: They're the funniest clients I've ever had! This will be a fun adventure for us!
Klaus: Ja! Why should Brian and Stewie from Family Guy have all the fun?
Roger: Brian and Stewie, those overrated assholes. Love to rip the intestines out of those 2 little cocksuckers!
Jivefunk and Dr. Afrostein were in their lab.
Dr. Afrostein: I have finally perfected my invention! (holds vial)
Jivefunk: What's it supposed to do, boss?
Dr. Afrostein: It turns fish into huge ass gorillas!
In their laboratory, Dr. Afrostein shows Jivefunk a pool of the vial of chemical he created.
Jivefunk: Damn!
Dr. Afrostein: If those honkys mess us, that fish ass is going in there! (laughs evilly)
Jivefunk: Do you plan to take over Langley Falls with your plan?
Dr. Afrostein: Awww, yeahhhhhh!
Back in the living room, Roger was orchestrating a plan to clean the chimney, they go outside and sweep the chimey from inside.
Roger: OKay, Klaus! Get me the ladder
Klaus does so, and Roger climbs the ladder to the roof.
Roger: Now throw me the broom.
Klaus: Want a whip and an idol, too? (throws broom at Roger): Here you go!
The broom hits Roger in the head.
Roger: OUCH DAMMIT!
Klaus: Sorry Roger!
Roger: Cheap shot A-Rod! Why don't you go bang Madonna while you're at it?
Klaus: I didn't know....you told me to hand it to you. That's the only way I can. I can't climb up the ladder....
Roger: Go inside before you cause more trouble!
Klaus: But Roger, I...
Roger: I have nothing to say!
Klaus goes inside while Roger tries to sweep the chimney
Roger: For some reason I feel very powerful with this moustache!
Scene 3:
Klaus was inside on standby in the living room where the fire place was. Jivefunk comes up to him with a becker full of chemicals.
Jivefunk: Yo, my main man. Yo ought to try this.
Klaus (takes the becker): What does it do?
Jivefunk: It cleans out all the smoke and soot out of the fireplace. You don't need any of that other (beep). This gets the job done faster!
Klaus: Wonderbar! I'll tell Roger right away.
Dr. Afrostein: JIVEFUNK! Stop watching that honky ass Rockford Files and get back in here!
Jivefunk: Yessir! I'll be right there!
Then Jivefunk went back to the laboratory, Roger was inside the chimney sweeping. He had plungers tied to his feet.
Roger: Hmmm, Bugs Bunny wasn't lying about how good this works! (soot gets all over his face) BLAH!
Klaus (calling out to Roger): Roger! I got an idea!
Roger: Don't want to hear it! I have nothing to say!
Klaus: Jivefunk gave me this chemical that will clean out the chimney....
Roger: No! Permission denied! Not talking to you!
Klaus: I'll do it anyway.
Roger: Don't you dare.....if you do I'll tell Stan you were selling Crystal Meth and Condoms over the internet.
Klaus doesn't heed Roger's warning. Klaus pours the beaker full of chemicals anyway. It created a huge bubbly mess, and the bubbles caused the chimney to be contaminated with white smoke that caused an explosion. The explosion caused Roger to fly out of the chimney and into the sky. Then Roger falls back into the chimney which causes the bricks to fall apart and break. Roger has soot all over his face.
Roger (flying then falling): WOOOAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!! I'LL (beep)ING KILL YOU, KLAUS!
Klaus: Roger! Are you okay?
Roger (falls back into the ground of the fireplace): GODAMMIT KLAUS! I'm gonna commit justifiable homicide on you!
Klaus (terrified): Nein! Stop! Sorry! I was just trying to help! (laughs) Hey, you look like Al Jolsen! Mammy! Mammy!
Roger (screaming): SHUT UP! I have nothing to say!
Just as Roger picked up Klaus from his bowl and started strangling him, Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk arrive at the living room.
Dr. Afrostein (laughs evilly): You've both fallen into our trap!
Roger (angerly): What do you mean, trap? This was Klaus's fault.
Dr. Afrostein: We didn't need our chimney cleaned. It was all a setup!
Klaus (gulps): Setup? For what? I set people up for trouble, only because I'm German. Never thought it would happen to me...
Jivefunk: You're going to make a fine guinea pig for our expirement!
Roger: Good! Take him! See if I care!
Jivefunk and Dr. Afrostein lead Roger and Klaus into their lab. They see the vat full of chemical and take Klaus and was about to dunk him in.
Dr. Afrostein: This was all a plan for World Domination!
Klaus: That's my area of expertise!
Jivefunk: Silence! This here vat turns fish into 10 foot gorillas!
Roger (chuckles): Gorilla Warfare, hey! (scoffs) You black people know a lot about that!
Dr. Afrostein: Then after he's turned into a gorilla, we clone his ass, and we take over Langley Falls.
Roger (laughs): Go ahead and have him!
Klaus: Roger No! Help me! You and I are BFFs! We're like two peas in a pod! We're like Britney and Christina! Paris and Nicole.......
Roger: Not anymore! Do whatever you want with him! I'm done with him! Just for the record, you're behind on the times, Klaus!
Dr. Afrostein: And this is also our plan to get back at Whitey! (laughs diabolocally)
Roger: Thought you blacks already did that when Obama became President. Blacks are getting jobs over white people you know. Watch HLN or CNN, much?
Jivefunk dunks Klaus into the vat of chemical. Roger thought it was all a joke at first and didn't think nothing of it and didn't take their plan seriously. Within seconds, Klaus morphs into a simian shape and starts to grow 10 feet in the air. Klaus was now a gorilla! Then Dr. Afrostein gets a spray gun and the Gorilla Klaus gets cloned and there was now 10 of them. Roger freaked out.
Roger (screeching): EEEEEEKKK!!! Holy (beep) I'm gettin' the (beep) out of here!
Dr. Afrostein: Go my monkey minions! Go! Destroy Langley and Chimdale! Most of all, destroy the WHITE MAN!
Jivefunk and Dr. Afrostein both laughed diabolically as Roger ran back into his truck and drove fast back to Langley Falls.
Dr. Afrostein: This plan is a success, and this is all thanks to you.....the......Rockford Files!
Scene 4:
Back at the Smith House, Stan and Francine were watching Jeopardy!
Stan: Did you know Weird Al did a sing about this show?
Francine: Actually, no.
Alex Trebek (on TV): Sal, you have control of the board, Select!
Sal (with a Brooklyn accent): I'll take "spoits" for $1000!
Stan (laughs): Did you hear how he pronounced that? Spoits!
Francine: Quiet! Trying to watch!
Alex Trebek (on TV): Sal, this is your game. Select again.
Sal: I'll take Bowel Movement for $1000!
Stan (cracking up): Why are Brooklyn Accents so hilarious? The category was Vowel Moment!
Francine (laughing): I know.
Outside, Steve, Barry, Toshi, and Snot were playing with Spin Tops.
Snot: OKay, Steve. If my Spin Top lasts the longest, I'm dating your sister.
Steve: Oh, ho ho ho! You are on!
Snot (holds Spin Top): I hearby present to you my.......Mazel Top!
Just as Snot was about to spin his top, Roger drives into the driveway and gets out of his van and runs into the house.
Roger (runs by): Hi, Steve. Hi, Snot. Hi, Barry. Hi, Toshi!
As Stan and Francine continued to Jeopardy, Roger runs into the house and hyperventailates.
Francine: Roger! What's going on?
Roger (hyperventailiates): Oh, nothing Frannie.
Stan: Francine? You're just letting him off the hook like that? Man, you're lenient. All right Roger! Confess now!
Roger: Well it's like this...
Stan: Are the police after you? Did someone discover you're an alien?
Roger: No, nothing like that. You see, I was selling meth and ecstasy to some kids at Steve's school. Nobody wanted to buy from me. So I got high from my own supply and so I jumped into the pool and screamed, "ROAR! I'M A CREATURE FROM THE SEA!"
Stan: Bull(beep) You got that from Juno! Don't you know that movie was written by a prostitute?
Roger: It's true, seriously.
Stan: What the hell were you running from?
Francine: Stan's right. It did seem like you were running from something. (suspiciously) Care to tell us? Hmmmmmm?
Outside Snot was playing with his Spin Top and Barry was jumping up and down cheering him on.
Barry: Yay! Go Snot! Go Snot! You da man!
Then the ground started to shake. Everyone assumed it was Barry.
Steve: Geez, Barry. Don't have to make Earthquakes.
Barry: It's not me. Just because I'm fat, you think I make Earthquakes?
Toshi (in Japanese): Now you know how I feel about hurtful stereotypes.
In a distance, Steve sees 10 Gorillas larger than life coming down the street.
Steve (screams): RUN FOR COVER!
Snot, Barry, and Toshi all ran home while Steve ran inside his house.
Steve: Dad! Dad! I'm seeing Gorillas!
Stan: Don't look at me when you say that!
Steve: Look for yourself. It's a fact.
Everyone ran outside. The ten gorillas were outside the Smith house.
Hayley: Oh, those poor gorillas. Jeff would want me to do something about this.
As Hayley leaves, one of the ten gorillas takes out an iPHONE.
Stan: What do you Gorillas want?
Francine: Is _this_ what you were running from?
Roger: Let's just say, Klaus is one of them.
Klaus: Right you are. You will all suffer for turning me into a fish! And the abuse I've had to suffer afterwards!
The iPhone plays Baauer's The Harlem Shake. Klaus and the Gorillas dance.
Stan: Heaven help us all if they play Gungnam Style.
Roger: Like Chris Cornell from Soundgarden. I Fell On Black Days.
Scene 5:
After the Gorillas stop dancing, Klaus grabs Francine and Steve and runs away. The Gorillas went their separate ways and were now smashing buildings, bridges, and killing people.
Francine: STAN!! HELP ME!
Steve: SAVE US, DAD! HELP!
Klaus: It has begun, fellow Gorillas! Destroy!
Stan runs into his SUV and drives to the CIA.
Roger: What about me, Stan?
Stan: I'll deal with you later, son of a bitch.
At the CIA, Stan, Jackson, Duper, and Reynolds were outside the building. Bullock was at the front door. Everyone was clamouring.
Bullock: All right. All right. Settle down everyone. I want those gorillas dead just as much as you all do.
They were all about to enter, and then Hayley and some of her fellow college students blocked the enterance.
Hayley: I can't let you do this, Dad! This is a sit-in!
The college students formed a chain of defiance and sat at the enterance.
Stan: Sit in? What is this? Crazy in Alabama?
Hayley: You want to kill those poor misguided, misunderstood Gorillas. They deserve to be happy and free!
Stan: Those Gorillas are cold blooded murderers! They kidnapped your Mom and Brother! You liberals would fight for the rights of terrorists, serial killers, and burmese pythons if you had to!
Hayley: Those Gorillas need love, nurturing and understanding!
Stan: You're just doing this because you're angerly acting out about what happened to Jeff!
Students: Love and Understanding! Happy and Free!
Jackson: I found our emergency enterance here on the lawn.
The CIA agents go into the emergency enterance.
Stan: Forgot about that, good thinking Jackson!
Song: Arcade Fire's Rococo plays.
Hayley: C'mon people! We're taking this to the streets!
The college students and Hayley walk down the street and protect. Back at the CIA, they were in the room filled with helocopters.
Bullock: Everyone grab a helocopter. They have bazookas and machine guns. Anyone who gets the most gorillas gets 6 weeks vacation! This is all.
Everyone runs into a helocopter and flies off. Stan flies to his house to pick up Roger, who was now out of his chimney sweeper clothes. Roger was wearing a wig of red hair, yellow shirt, black jeans, and sneakers.
Roger: Stan! You're taking me?
Stan: Damn right I am. I need you to be my sniper!
Roger: That I can do. Gonna kick Klaus's ass!
Stan flies off in the helocopter with Roger in tow. They spot a gorilla on top of a building.
Roger: Want to know what we are? (singing): We're Magnificent Men and Their Flying Machines!
Stan: That movie was a cheap rip off of The Great Race! Less jokes and more shooting!
Roger (grabs bazooka): Feel the wrath of my Banana Gun, dickhead!
Then Roger shoots the Gorilla with the bazooka and the Gorilla exploded. Hayley and the college students throw rocks at the helocopters.
Stan: HA! No rocks can take us down.
Roger: Hey look, some of your friends are coming. (gets hit with a rock): OUCH! Where's some Tear Gas when you need it?
Agents Duper and Jackson were flying between Stan.
Duper: How many did you get? I got two!
Jackson: I got three!
Stan: I got one so far!
Duper (laughs): That's typical! (flies away)
Jackson: Later, douchebag! (flies away)
As Duper and Jackson fly away, a Gorilla grabbed the end of Stan's helocopter.
Stan: There seems to be some extra weight!
Roger: It's a Gorilla! It's not Klaus!
Stan: Blow it's brains out!
Roger tries to do so. The Machine Gun shots richoceted on it's head. The Gorilla wrestles Roger until he grabs the bazooka and blows the Gorilla's head off. Blood and brains were all over. Then the Gorilla's headless carcass falls into a smokestack. The smokestack explodes.
Stan: That was awesome, Roger!
Roger: He'll be getting to star on his own reality show! Smoked!
Scene 6:
In a Mountain Area, Francine and Steve were in a cave. Klaus was coming to them.
Francine: Don't worry, honey. Everything will be fine. Your father will come through.
Steve: What does Klaus want with us?
Francine: That's not your worry. Let the big people in your family worry. He's always been in love with me....
Steve: Not my worry......
Francine (hugs Steve and sings): I See The Moon, The Moon Sees Me.....
Klaus (comes to the cave): You sang that song to Roger.
Francine: Klaus! Why did you kidnap us?
Klaus: Because I've always been jealous, Francine! Why do you have to be married to Stan? I should be your husband and Steve's father!
Steve: Why did you kidnap me, too?
Klaus: You're a liability! Anyway, I brought you here so we can be a family. I will be your husband from now on. And I will be Steve's father...
Steve: A Gorilla my father? Now I'll really be a social pariah! Girls will never want to have anything to do with me! (sobs)
Klaus: I'll home school you. In the meantime, we will live here in this cave....
Just then a white pimpmobile-style limo arrives. Out comes Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk.
Dr. Afrostein: Good job getting us some captives!
Jivefunk: Even better job helping us destroy Langley Falls and Chimdale.
Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk grab Francine and Steve and put them in their limo and take them to their hideout.
Francine: What the (beep) do you want from us?
Steve: Kidnapped twice in a row.
Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk drive away with Francine and Steve. Which leaves Klaus livid with rage.
Klaus: Now I'm really mad now! Nobody steals Francine away from me!
Then Klaus runs back into the city and destroys things in his path. There were now 5 Gorillas left.
Scene 7:
At the mansion in Chimdale. Dr. Afrostein had Francine and Steve locked in a cell.
Francine: You'll never get away with this!
Dr. Afrostein: Oh, yeah! All of Langley Falls and Chimdale are virtually gone anyway. And then, all of America will pay for repressing blacks!
Francine: How can you kidnap an innocent child like this?
Dr. Afrostein: Because he's white! I'm doing this to take down The Man! The White Man! Then America will be a nation of blacks!
Francine: You should go join the Black Panthers if you hate whites so much.
Dr. Afrostein: Why join a club when you can do it on your own?
Francine: My CIA husband is going to kick your big black dick!
Dr. Afrostein: We'll see about that. (leaves the room and pulls a lever) In the meantime enjoy this! Ancient Chinese.....Water Torture!
The cell was flooding with water. Little did they realize there was a broken window in the cell.
Steve: Come on, Mom! We have to get out of here.
As Francine and Steve were trying to figure a way out. Hayley and her fellow College Students were stil protesting.
Hayley: What do we want?
College Students: Free Gorillas!
Hayley: When do we want it?
College Students: NOW!!!!
Hayley stops and breaks down and cries.
College Student: What's wrong?
Hayley: Just care so much about saving these gorillas. I just wish I had Jeff to enjoy this with! (sobs)
College Student: How did your husband Jeff die?
Hayley: Plane Crash.
Stan and Roger were in the helocopter and killed 2 more Gorillas and they were headed for Klaus.
Scene 8:
Stan and Roger were closing in on Klaus. Roger gets the bazooka ready. Beside them, Agent Jackson gets another gorilla.
Jackson: Yes! Woo Hoo! Got another one!
Stan: This mission has become Planet Of the Apes come true!
Roger: Where's James Franco when you need him?
Stan: Klaus! Surrender right now! Where's Francine and Steve?
Klaus: Nein! I'll never tell! If I can't have Francine! No one can!
Roger: Okay, you ask for it! (shoots bazooka at KLaus)
When the bazooka shell hits KLaus he fell to the ground. Stan lands the helocopter next to him and runs out.
Stan: You dumbass! Why did you do that? He could've told us where Francine is.
Then the Gorilla opens up and Klaus the goldfish was inside. Roger puts him in a bowl.
Roger: At least he's still alive.
Klaus: Great. Another attempt at Francine domination ruined.
Stan: Where's Francine you son of a bitch?
Klaus: I had her and Steve for a while, and now a mad scientist has her.
Meanwhile at Dr. Afrostein's mansion. Francine and Steve were swimming in the water leaking in the cell. Steve sees the broken window.
Steve: Look Mom! A broken window!
Francine: Excellent, Steve. We're both skinny so we can fit through.
Steve and Francine swim out of the window and they were free. They run into a car and drive to find Steve and Roger. Back in Langley Falls....
Stan: What do you mean a mad scientist?
Dr. Afrostein: Behind you, Fuzz!
Scene 9:
Stan and Roger turn as see Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk. They were armed with guns as were Stan and Roger.
Roger: I clean your chimney and this is how you repay me?
Jivefunk: Shut Yo honky ass up Rockford Files!
Stan: What's he talking about?
Roger: I'll tell you later. They're the ones who turned Klaus into a gorilla and cloned him.
Stan: What did you do to my wife?
Dr. Afrostein: Yo gonna hafta catch us, first! (shoots at Stan's feet)
Jivefunk and Dr. Afrostein ran away and into a train station.
Roger: We gonna git ya, sucka!
Stan and Roger chase after them and both teams were shooting guns at one another.
Dr. Afrostein: We run faster than Jesse Owens!
Jivefunk and Dr. Afrostein jump onto a moving boxcar. Stan and Roger do the same. They try to fight them off, but fail.
Stan (falls off boxcar): We'll get you homewreckers! Damn this is like a 1950's Gangster movie!
Roger (falling off boxcar): They're like an evil version of Undercover Brother! (sees them run into an alley) They're in that alley! Let's get 'em!
Stan and Roger run out of the train station and into the alley. Two janitors observe the chaos.
Janitor #1: Now here's something you don't see everyday, Chauncy?
Janitor #2: What's that Edgar?
Janitor #1: CIA Agent and an average Joe chasing after two angry black guys in a train station.
Scene 10 Conclusion:
Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk were in the alley thinking they got away from Stan and Roger. Then Stan and Roger catch up to them.
Dr. Afrostein: Damn, they slick!
Stan: Stan Smith, CIA! You're under arrest!
Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk were backed against a brick wall. Stan beats up Dr. Afrostein and Roger has a gun on Jivefunk. Stan punches and kicks Dr. Afrostein into an electrical force field and receives a huge electric shock. Dr. Afrostein was dead.
Jivefunk: Damn you crazy Rockford Files!
Roger: Want to know what my favorite Pink Floyd album is?
Jivefunk: What is it?
Roger: The Wall! (shoots Jivefunk until he is dead)
Stan: Glad that's over. Two cars pull up in front of them and Klaus is there, too. Francine and Steve come out of one car and Bullock and Jackson in another.
Francine (runs to Stan): STAN!
Steve: Dad!
Stan: Francine! Steve! Why do you guys look like Sid Ceaser and his wife in It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World?
Francine: Our smart son helped us escape!
Steve: Those scientists did Chinese Water Torture on us! We were both skinny enough to squeeze out of a window. Guess my late puberty pays off!
Bullock: Well done Smith. Even though you didn't get most of them, Jackson did!
Jackson: I'm off to Tahaiti to score me some hookers! WOOOO! (holds beer bottle)
Bullock: In the meantime you and the rest of the CIA and the military will help rebuild Langley Falls and Chimdale.
Stan: No problem! Time off bores me anyway!
Roger: You sure proved that when you were Poppa Wheelie!
Hayley (cries): You fascist CIA agents killed those gorillas! I'll never forgive you! (runs off).
Klaus: Zo! Roger! We're still BFFs, right? Am I still part of this family even though I almost killed everyone in town?
One by one everyone walks away from Klaus in disgust.
Roger: I have nothing to say.
Steve: Neither do I!
Stan: I sure don't!
Francine: Same here!
Stan, Francine, Roger, and Steve all walked away from Klaus and walked home in the midst of all the destruction.
Klaus: Oh! (laughs) I get it! You guys are joking! You are, aren't you? Don't walk away! Wait for me!
A Stray Dog comes up to Klaus as he was trying to catch up to the Smiths and starts sniffing Klaus's bowl.
Klaus: This can't be good!
THE END
Closing Credits
American Dad!
Fanfic Title:
Very Ape!
By: Trenton Sands
Opening Credits Scene:
Roger's Disguise: Max Jets
Scene 1:
In Roger's attic at the Smith house, Roger was on the phone while Klaus was on the internet.
Roger (on phone): Mmm, Hmm? Yes. What? (combatively) What do you mean, you need to know my name? Fine! It's Roc..ky...Denn....is......Rockford Files! Yes, my name is Rockford Files! I live in a trailer on the beach with my father, I fought in the Korean War. Then I used to be a con man and went to prison through no fault of my own, I have issues with my ex-cellmate named Angel. Sure. Where do you live? Chimdale? In a mansion? Can do! We'll be right over! (jumping up and down and causing a shake) YES!!! YES!! YES!! I did it! I did it!
Klaus (wheeling himself in a half bowl): What are you doing? Reenacting a late 90's Geico commercial? Keep it down in here! I'm writing a Brickleberry fanfic!
Roger: That show's only been on for one season, and you're already writing fanfics? I thought you can't read.
Klaus: Actually, I can. Just saying that to get attention. Why are you so happy about that you had to interupt me?
Roger: I just got my first client for my Chimney Sweeping Business! And you're coming with me!
Klaus: Oh, Mein God. Always dragged along with your kooky situations!
Roger (grabs Klaus): And you're going to be my dumbass helper!
Klaus and Roger both dressed in derbies, white blouses and black overalls. Roger also had a Charlie Chaplin moustache on. Roger then drives to Chimdale on a truck that says Out Of This World Chimney Sweepers! The Best Chimney Sweepers in Langley Falls! The truck also had a UFO and a planet on it. As they were driving, Roger and Klaus have the radio blaring. They both sing along to Badfinger's No Matter What.
Roger and Klaus (singing): No Matter What You Are! I Will Always Be With You! Doesn't Matter What You Do Girl! Ooh, Girl With You! No Matter What You Do, I Will Always Always Be Around, No Matter......
Pete Ham (though the radio): HEY! Would you two shut the (beep) up and let me sing?
Roger (turns off radio): Thought rock stars loved it when fans sang their songs.
Scene 2:
Roger and Klaus finally arrive in Chimdale. The place they are at is in the slums and the mansion is in the middle of it.
Klaus: Wow! Love this place! This was something I hoped to live in when I was in Germany.
Roger: No surprise there. (rings the doorbell) Out of This World Chimney Sweepers!
Two men answered and it was two black men wearing lab coats and had afros.
Man #1: What cho want?
Klaus: We're the Chimney Sweepers you asked for.
Roger: Rockford Files! At your service! What's your name?
Man #1: My name is Dr. Afrostein, and this is my assistant....
Roger: Let me guess, Benson, right?! Like the black butler from Soap?
Man #1: No his name is Jivefunk!
Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk lead Roger and Klaus to the living room where the fireplace was.
Roger: Oh, my god? (snickers) Is your last name, Afrostein?
Dr. Afrostein: Yeah, that's what I said, foo!
Roger: Are you a Black Jew?
Dr. Afrostein: Yeah, what of it?
Roger: No way! Get out! A Black Jew? Boy do I have a song for you! (sings to the tune of The Beatles Blackbird): Black Jew singing in the dead of night......take these broken.....
Dr. Afrostein: Silence! We don't allow that Lennon/McCartney honkey jive 'round here!
Jivefink: We only listen to the funky stuff! Like Earth Wind and Fire, The Spinners, George Clinton and the Paralement, The Isley Brothers The Commandores, Isaac Hayes, The Temptations, Barry White, and Boz Scaggs! Wall of sound, baby!
Klaus: Was your Poppa a Rolling Stone? Is Carlos Santana funky, too?
Dr. Afrostein: Shut up! Go in there and get yo asses to work!
As Roger and Klaus ready to get to work on the chimney they were snickering and laughing at their clients.
Klaus: They're stuck in the 1970's! Too much Sweet Sweetbacks Blaxploitation films for them!
Roger: They're the funniest clients I've ever had! This will be a fun adventure for us!
Klaus: Ja! Why should Brian and Stewie from Family Guy have all the fun?
Roger: Brian and Stewie, those overrated assholes. Love to rip the intestines out of those 2 little cocksuckers!
Jivefunk and Dr. Afrostein were in their lab.
Dr. Afrostein: I have finally perfected my invention! (holds vial)
Jivefunk: What's it supposed to do, boss?
Dr. Afrostein: It turns fish into huge ass gorillas!
In their laboratory, Dr. Afrostein shows Jivefunk a pool of the vial of chemical he created.
Jivefunk: Damn!
Dr. Afrostein: If those honkys mess us, that fish ass is going in there! (laughs evilly)
Jivefunk: Do you plan to take over Langley Falls with your plan?
Dr. Afrostein: Awww, yeahhhhhh!
Back in the living room, Roger was orchestrating a plan to clean the chimney, they go outside and sweep the chimey from inside.
Roger: OKay, Klaus! Get me the ladder
Klaus does so, and Roger climbs the ladder to the roof.
Roger: Now throw me the broom.
Klaus: Want a whip and an idol, too? (throws broom at Roger): Here you go!
The broom hits Roger in the head.
Roger: OUCH DAMMIT!
Klaus: Sorry Roger!
Roger: Cheap shot A-Rod! Why don't you go bang Madonna while you're at it?
Klaus: I didn't know....you told me to hand it to you. That's the only way I can. I can't climb up the ladder....
Roger: Go inside before you cause more trouble!
Klaus: But Roger, I...
Roger: I have nothing to say!
Klaus goes inside while Roger tries to sweep the chimney
Roger: For some reason I feel very powerful with this moustache!
Scene 3:
Klaus was inside on standby in the living room where the fire place was. Jivefunk comes up to him with a becker full of chemicals.
Jivefunk: Yo, my main man. Yo ought to try this.
Klaus (takes the becker): What does it do?
Jivefunk: It cleans out all the smoke and soot out of the fireplace. You don't need any of that other (beep). This gets the job done faster!
Klaus: Wonderbar! I'll tell Roger right away.
Dr. Afrostein: JIVEFUNK! Stop watching that honky ass Rockford Files and get back in here!
Jivefunk: Yessir! I'll be right there!
Then Jivefunk went back to the laboratory, Roger was inside the chimney sweeping. He had plungers tied to his feet.
Roger: Hmmm, Bugs Bunny wasn't lying about how good this works! (soot gets all over his face) BLAH!
Klaus (calling out to Roger): Roger! I got an idea!
Roger: Don't want to hear it! I have nothing to say!
Klaus: Jivefunk gave me this chemical that will clean out the chimney....
Roger: No! Permission denied! Not talking to you!
Klaus: I'll do it anyway.
Roger: Don't you dare.....if you do I'll tell Stan you were selling Crystal Meth and Condoms over the internet.
Klaus doesn't heed Roger's warning. Klaus pours the beaker full of chemicals anyway. It created a huge bubbly mess, and the bubbles caused the chimney to be contaminated with white smoke that caused an explosion. The explosion caused Roger to fly out of the chimney and into the sky. Then Roger falls back into the chimney which causes the bricks to fall apart and break. Roger has soot all over his face.
Roger (flying then falling): WOOOAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!! I'LL (beep)ING KILL YOU, KLAUS!
Klaus: Roger! Are you okay?
Roger (falls back into the ground of the fireplace): GODAMMIT KLAUS! I'm gonna commit justifiable homicide on you!
Klaus (terrified): Nein! Stop! Sorry! I was just trying to help! (laughs) Hey, you look like Al Jolsen! Mammy! Mammy!
Roger (screaming): SHUT UP! I have nothing to say!
Just as Roger picked up Klaus from his bowl and started strangling him, Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk arrive at the living room.
Dr. Afrostein (laughs evilly): You've both fallen into our trap!
Roger (angerly): What do you mean, trap? This was Klaus's fault.
Dr. Afrostein: We didn't need our chimney cleaned. It was all a setup!
Klaus (gulps): Setup? For what? I set people up for trouble, only because I'm German. Never thought it would happen to me...
Jivefunk: You're going to make a fine guinea pig for our expirement!
Roger: Good! Take him! See if I care!
Jivefunk and Dr. Afrostein lead Roger and Klaus into their lab. They see the vat full of chemical and take Klaus and was about to dunk him in.
Dr. Afrostein: This was all a plan for World Domination!
Klaus: That's my area of expertise!
Jivefunk: Silence! This here vat turns fish into 10 foot gorillas!
Roger (chuckles): Gorilla Warfare, hey! (scoffs) You black people know a lot about that!
Dr. Afrostein: Then after he's turned into a gorilla, we clone his ass, and we take over Langley Falls.
Roger (laughs): Go ahead and have him!
Klaus: Roger No! Help me! You and I are BFFs! We're like two peas in a pod! We're like Britney and Christina! Paris and Nicole.......
Roger: Not anymore! Do whatever you want with him! I'm done with him! Just for the record, you're behind on the times, Klaus!
Dr. Afrostein: And this is also our plan to get back at Whitey! (laughs diabolocally)
Roger: Thought you blacks already did that when Obama became President. Blacks are getting jobs over white people you know. Watch HLN or CNN, much?
Jivefunk dunks Klaus into the vat of chemical. Roger thought it was all a joke at first and didn't think nothing of it and didn't take their plan seriously. Within seconds, Klaus morphs into a simian shape and starts to grow 10 feet in the air. Klaus was now a gorilla! Then Dr. Afrostein gets a spray gun and the Gorilla Klaus gets cloned and there was now 10 of them. Roger freaked out.
Roger (screeching): EEEEEEKKK!!! Holy (beep) I'm gettin' the (beep) out of here!
Dr. Afrostein: Go my monkey minions! Go! Destroy Langley and Chimdale! Most of all, destroy the WHITE MAN!
Jivefunk and Dr. Afrostein both laughed diabolically as Roger ran back into his truck and drove fast back to Langley Falls.
Dr. Afrostein: This plan is a success, and this is all thanks to you.....the......Rockford Files!
Scene 4:
Back at the Smith House, Stan and Francine were watching Jeopardy!
Stan: Did you know Weird Al did a sing about this show?
Francine: Actually, no.
Alex Trebek (on TV): Sal, you have control of the board, Select!
Sal (with a Brooklyn accent): I'll take "spoits" for $1000!
Stan (laughs): Did you hear how he pronounced that? Spoits!
Francine: Quiet! Trying to watch!
Alex Trebek (on TV): Sal, this is your game. Select again.
Sal: I'll take Bowel Movement for $1000!
Stan (cracking up): Why are Brooklyn Accents so hilarious? The category was Vowel Moment!
Francine (laughing): I know.
Outside, Steve, Barry, Toshi, and Snot were playing with Spin Tops.
Snot: OKay, Steve. If my Spin Top lasts the longest, I'm dating your sister.
Steve: Oh, ho ho ho! You are on!
Snot (holds Spin Top): I hearby present to you my.......Mazel Top!
Just as Snot was about to spin his top, Roger drives into the driveway and gets out of his van and runs into the house.
Roger (runs by): Hi, Steve. Hi, Snot. Hi, Barry. Hi, Toshi!
As Stan and Francine continued to Jeopardy, Roger runs into the house and hyperventailates.
Francine: Roger! What's going on?
Roger (hyperventailiates): Oh, nothing Frannie.
Stan: Francine? You're just letting him off the hook like that? Man, you're lenient. All right Roger! Confess now!
Roger: Well it's like this...
Stan: Are the police after you? Did someone discover you're an alien?
Roger: No, nothing like that. You see, I was selling meth and ecstasy to some kids at Steve's school. Nobody wanted to buy from me. So I got high from my own supply and so I jumped into the pool and screamed, "ROAR! I'M A CREATURE FROM THE SEA!"
Stan: Bull(beep) You got that from Juno! Don't you know that movie was written by a prostitute?
Roger: It's true, seriously.
Stan: What the hell were you running from?
Francine: Stan's right. It did seem like you were running from something. (suspiciously) Care to tell us? Hmmmmmm?
Outside Snot was playing with his Spin Top and Barry was jumping up and down cheering him on.
Barry: Yay! Go Snot! Go Snot! You da man!
Then the ground started to shake. Everyone assumed it was Barry.
Steve: Geez, Barry. Don't have to make Earthquakes.
Barry: It's not me. Just because I'm fat, you think I make Earthquakes?
Toshi (in Japanese): Now you know how I feel about hurtful stereotypes.
In a distance, Steve sees 10 Gorillas larger than life coming down the street.
Steve (screams): RUN FOR COVER!
Snot, Barry, and Toshi all ran home while Steve ran inside his house.
Steve: Dad! Dad! I'm seeing Gorillas!
Stan: Don't look at me when you say that!
Steve: Look for yourself. It's a fact.
Everyone ran outside. The ten gorillas were outside the Smith house.
Hayley: Oh, those poor gorillas. Jeff would want me to do something about this.
As Hayley leaves, one of the ten gorillas takes out an iPHONE.
Stan: What do you Gorillas want?
Francine: Is _this_ what you were running from?
Roger: Let's just say, Klaus is one of them.
Klaus: Right you are. You will all suffer for turning me into a fish! And the abuse I've had to suffer afterwards!
The iPhone plays Baauer's The Harlem Shake. Klaus and the Gorillas dance.
Stan: Heaven help us all if they play Gungnam Style.
Roger: Like Chris Cornell from Soundgarden. I Fell On Black Days.
Scene 5:
After the Gorillas stop dancing, Klaus grabs Francine and Steve and runs away. The Gorillas went their separate ways and were now smashing buildings, bridges, and killing people.
Francine: STAN!! HELP ME!
Steve: SAVE US, DAD! HELP!
Klaus: It has begun, fellow Gorillas! Destroy!
Stan runs into his SUV and drives to the CIA.
Roger: What about me, Stan?
Stan: I'll deal with you later, son of a bitch.
At the CIA, Stan, Jackson, Duper, and Reynolds were outside the building. Bullock was at the front door. Everyone was clamouring.
Bullock: All right. All right. Settle down everyone. I want those gorillas dead just as much as you all do.
They were all about to enter, and then Hayley and some of her fellow college students blocked the enterance.
Hayley: I can't let you do this, Dad! This is a sit-in!
The college students formed a chain of defiance and sat at the enterance.
Stan: Sit in? What is this? Crazy in Alabama?
Hayley: You want to kill those poor misguided, misunderstood Gorillas. They deserve to be happy and free!
Stan: Those Gorillas are cold blooded murderers! They kidnapped your Mom and Brother! You liberals would fight for the rights of terrorists, serial killers, and burmese pythons if you had to!
Hayley: Those Gorillas need love, nurturing and understanding!
Stan: You're just doing this because you're angerly acting out about what happened to Jeff!
Students: Love and Understanding! Happy and Free!
Jackson: I found our emergency enterance here on the lawn.
The CIA agents go into the emergency enterance.
Stan: Forgot about that, good thinking Jackson!
Song: Arcade Fire's Rococo plays.
Hayley: C'mon people! We're taking this to the streets!
The college students and Hayley walk down the street and protect. Back at the CIA, they were in the room filled with helocopters.
Bullock: Everyone grab a helocopter. They have bazookas and machine guns. Anyone who gets the most gorillas gets 6 weeks vacation! This is all.
Everyone runs into a helocopter and flies off. Stan flies to his house to pick up Roger, who was now out of his chimney sweeper clothes. Roger was wearing a wig of red hair, yellow shirt, black jeans, and sneakers.
Roger: Stan! You're taking me?
Stan: Damn right I am. I need you to be my sniper!
Roger: That I can do. Gonna kick Klaus's ass!
Stan flies off in the helocopter with Roger in tow. They spot a gorilla on top of a building.
Roger: Want to know what we are? (singing): We're Magnificent Men and Their Flying Machines!
Stan: That movie was a cheap rip off of The Great Race! Less jokes and more shooting!
Roger (grabs bazooka): Feel the wrath of my Banana Gun, dickhead!
Then Roger shoots the Gorilla with the bazooka and the Gorilla exploded. Hayley and the college students throw rocks at the helocopters.
Stan: HA! No rocks can take us down.
Roger: Hey look, some of your friends are coming. (gets hit with a rock): OUCH! Where's some Tear Gas when you need it?
Agents Duper and Jackson were flying between Stan.
Duper: How many did you get? I got two!
Jackson: I got three!
Stan: I got one so far!
Duper (laughs): That's typical! (flies away)
Jackson: Later, douchebag! (flies away)
As Duper and Jackson fly away, a Gorilla grabbed the end of Stan's helocopter.
Stan: There seems to be some extra weight!
Roger: It's a Gorilla! It's not Klaus!
Stan: Blow it's brains out!
Roger tries to do so. The Machine Gun shots richoceted on it's head. The Gorilla wrestles Roger until he grabs the bazooka and blows the Gorilla's head off. Blood and brains were all over. Then the Gorilla's headless carcass falls into a smokestack. The smokestack explodes.
Stan: That was awesome, Roger!
Roger: He'll be getting to star on his own reality show! Smoked!
Scene 6:
In a Mountain Area, Francine and Steve were in a cave. Klaus was coming to them.
Francine: Don't worry, honey. Everything will be fine. Your father will come through.
Steve: What does Klaus want with us?
Francine: That's not your worry. Let the big people in your family worry. He's always been in love with me....
Steve: Not my worry......
Francine (hugs Steve and sings): I See The Moon, The Moon Sees Me.....
Klaus (comes to the cave): You sang that song to Roger.
Francine: Klaus! Why did you kidnap us?
Klaus: Because I've always been jealous, Francine! Why do you have to be married to Stan? I should be your husband and Steve's father!
Steve: Why did you kidnap me, too?
Klaus: You're a liability! Anyway, I brought you here so we can be a family. I will be your husband from now on. And I will be Steve's father...
Steve: A Gorilla my father? Now I'll really be a social pariah! Girls will never want to have anything to do with me! (sobs)
Klaus: I'll home school you. In the meantime, we will live here in this cave....
Just then a white pimpmobile-style limo arrives. Out comes Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk.
Dr. Afrostein: Good job getting us some captives!
Jivefunk: Even better job helping us destroy Langley Falls and Chimdale.
Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk grab Francine and Steve and put them in their limo and take them to their hideout.
Francine: What the (beep) do you want from us?
Steve: Kidnapped twice in a row.
Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk drive away with Francine and Steve. Which leaves Klaus livid with rage.
Klaus: Now I'm really mad now! Nobody steals Francine away from me!
Then Klaus runs back into the city and destroys things in his path. There were now 5 Gorillas left.
Scene 7:
At the mansion in Chimdale. Dr. Afrostein had Francine and Steve locked in a cell.
Francine: You'll never get away with this!
Dr. Afrostein: Oh, yeah! All of Langley Falls and Chimdale are virtually gone anyway. And then, all of America will pay for repressing blacks!
Francine: How can you kidnap an innocent child like this?
Dr. Afrostein: Because he's white! I'm doing this to take down The Man! The White Man! Then America will be a nation of blacks!
Francine: You should go join the Black Panthers if you hate whites so much.
Dr. Afrostein: Why join a club when you can do it on your own?
Francine: My CIA husband is going to kick your big black dick!
Dr. Afrostein: We'll see about that. (leaves the room and pulls a lever) In the meantime enjoy this! Ancient Chinese.....Water Torture!
The cell was flooding with water. Little did they realize there was a broken window in the cell.
Steve: Come on, Mom! We have to get out of here.
As Francine and Steve were trying to figure a way out. Hayley and her fellow College Students were stil protesting.
Hayley: What do we want?
College Students: Free Gorillas!
Hayley: When do we want it?
College Students: NOW!!!!
Hayley stops and breaks down and cries.
College Student: What's wrong?
Hayley: Just care so much about saving these gorillas. I just wish I had Jeff to enjoy this with! (sobs)
College Student: How did your husband Jeff die?
Hayley: Plane Crash.
Stan and Roger were in the helocopter and killed 2 more Gorillas and they were headed for Klaus.
Scene 8:
Stan and Roger were closing in on Klaus. Roger gets the bazooka ready. Beside them, Agent Jackson gets another gorilla.
Jackson: Yes! Woo Hoo! Got another one!
Stan: This mission has become Planet Of the Apes come true!
Roger: Where's James Franco when you need him?
Stan: Klaus! Surrender right now! Where's Francine and Steve?
Klaus: Nein! I'll never tell! If I can't have Francine! No one can!
Roger: Okay, you ask for it! (shoots bazooka at KLaus)
When the bazooka shell hits KLaus he fell to the ground. Stan lands the helocopter next to him and runs out.
Stan: You dumbass! Why did you do that? He could've told us where Francine is.
Then the Gorilla opens up and Klaus the goldfish was inside. Roger puts him in a bowl.
Roger: At least he's still alive.
Klaus: Great. Another attempt at Francine domination ruined.
Stan: Where's Francine you son of a bitch?
Klaus: I had her and Steve for a while, and now a mad scientist has her.
Meanwhile at Dr. Afrostein's mansion. Francine and Steve were swimming in the water leaking in the cell. Steve sees the broken window.
Steve: Look Mom! A broken window!
Francine: Excellent, Steve. We're both skinny so we can fit through.
Steve and Francine swim out of the window and they were free. They run into a car and drive to find Steve and Roger. Back in Langley Falls....
Stan: What do you mean a mad scientist?
Dr. Afrostein: Behind you, Fuzz!
Scene 9:
Stan and Roger turn as see Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk. They were armed with guns as were Stan and Roger.
Roger: I clean your chimney and this is how you repay me?
Jivefunk: Shut Yo honky ass up Rockford Files!
Stan: What's he talking about?
Roger: I'll tell you later. They're the ones who turned Klaus into a gorilla and cloned him.
Stan: What did you do to my wife?
Dr. Afrostein: Yo gonna hafta catch us, first! (shoots at Stan's feet)
Jivefunk and Dr. Afrostein ran away and into a train station.
Roger: We gonna git ya, sucka!
Stan and Roger chase after them and both teams were shooting guns at one another.
Dr. Afrostein: We run faster than Jesse Owens!
Jivefunk and Dr. Afrostein jump onto a moving boxcar. Stan and Roger do the same. They try to fight them off, but fail.
Stan (falls off boxcar): We'll get you homewreckers! Damn this is like a 1950's Gangster movie!
Roger (falling off boxcar): They're like an evil version of Undercover Brother! (sees them run into an alley) They're in that alley! Let's get 'em!
Stan and Roger run out of the train station and into the alley. Two janitors observe the chaos.
Janitor #1: Now here's something you don't see everyday, Chauncy?
Janitor #2: What's that Edgar?
Janitor #1: CIA Agent and an average Joe chasing after two angry black guys in a train station.
Scene 10 Conclusion:
Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk were in the alley thinking they got away from Stan and Roger. Then Stan and Roger catch up to them.
Dr. Afrostein: Damn, they slick!
Stan: Stan Smith, CIA! You're under arrest!
Dr. Afrostein and Jivefunk were backed against a brick wall. Stan beats up Dr. Afrostein and Roger has a gun on Jivefunk. Stan punches and kicks Dr. Afrostein into an electrical force field and receives a huge electric shock. Dr. Afrostein was dead.
Jivefunk: Damn you crazy Rockford Files!
Roger: Want to know what my favorite Pink Floyd album is?
Jivefunk: What is it?
Roger: The Wall! (shoots Jivefunk until he is dead)
Stan: Glad that's over. Two cars pull up in front of them and Klaus is there, too. Francine and Steve come out of one car and Bullock and Jackson in another.
Francine (runs to Stan): STAN!
Steve: Dad!
Stan: Francine! Steve! Why do you guys look like Sid Ceaser and his wife in It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World?
Francine: Our smart son helped us escape!
Steve: Those scientists did Chinese Water Torture on us! We were both skinny enough to squeeze out of a window. Guess my late puberty pays off!
Bullock: Well done Smith. Even though you didn't get most of them, Jackson did!
Jackson: I'm off to Tahaiti to score me some hookers! WOOOO! (holds beer bottle)
Bullock: In the meantime you and the rest of the CIA and the military will help rebuild Langley Falls and Chimdale.
Stan: No problem! Time off bores me anyway!
Roger: You sure proved that when you were Poppa Wheelie!
Hayley (cries): You fascist CIA agents killed those gorillas! I'll never forgive you! (runs off).
Klaus: Zo! Roger! We're still BFFs, right? Am I still part of this family even though I almost killed everyone in town?
One by one everyone walks away from Klaus in disgust.
Roger: I have nothing to say.
Steve: Neither do I!
Stan: I sure don't!
Francine: Same here!
Stan, Francine, Roger, and Steve all walked away from Klaus and walked home in the midst of all the destruction.
Klaus: Oh! (laughs) I get it! You guys are joking! You are, aren't you? Don't walk away! Wait for me!
A Stray Dog comes up to Klaus as he was trying to catch up to the Smiths and starts sniffing Klaus's bowl.
Klaus: This can't be good!
THE END
Closing Credits
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