Categories > Original > Poetry
breathe
1 Reviewssomething we do everyday...but this time something is different for me. please r/r! just try this poem...it might rock your socks off! :] (and yes this is about love, again).
Reviews
-
breathe
(#) Rous 2006-06-01 04:05:54 AM
Aside from the need for punctuation, this leaves me...well, wanting more. It has some nice imagery to it, but little substance. "The wind slowly..." yet "the air rushes..." Kind of a contradiction here. There is little flow. And your ending just hangs there. Again, with some work, this could be very nice.
Thank you for sharing.