you are kicking other writers in the balls with this one. visualize that.
the scenes that are shown via the television are perfect, because they don't reveal the whole situation, but rater help lead pete to a place where he can do that for himself and reminisce. in turn, that describes his feelings toward it and we get to hear it from pete's point of view. it would have been easier for you to write the scene with laura falling off the horse, but you took the road less traveled and it's way more scenic. it was beautifully written.
the story flows seamlessly. pete's inner termoil makes me swoon- the way he seems to be looking deeper into himself and developing a different view of things.
We could have been so happy together. Even without music, even without Fall out Boy. very powerful. his whole life revolves around fall out boy, and he seemed to be more or less addicted to the attention he received from that. but he seems like he would disregard it for her.
feel better soon, asshole spice. take a rating point, too.
Author's response
That's why they call me Neuter-Alex. (At least inside of my head "they" do.)
Your review makes me happy and kicks my illness in the balls. (Join my club? 35% off of soccer shoes with spikes to get the job done more efficiently.)
DoJlove